Dumbing it down
Two decades later, duo as dense as ever
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Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 09/11/2014 (3982 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.
MOVIES
BIG RELEASE FRIDAY: Dumb and Dumber To
BIG PICTURE: A lot has changed in the last 20 years for Jim Carrey and Jeff Daniels. Carrey is now mostly famous for doing Matthew McConaughey impressions on Saturday Night Live; Daniels plays a “serious newsman” on HBO’s The Newsroom. Fortunately, Lloyd and Harry, the two numbskulls they played in 1994’s Dumber and Dumber, haven’t changed one bit. And the Farrelly brothers still know how to direct stupidity and slapstick. Two decades after their first ill-fated road trip, Lloyd and Harry embark on a new sojourn, this time in search of the latter’s long-lost daughter. All your favourite one-liners will be recycled again! You’ll “like it a lot.” But with these sweet simpletons, stupidity never felt so sincere. (For example, Harry named his cat Butthole because he discovered it has one.)

FORECAST: Daniels recently described the sequel’s plot as “thin and thinner.” This film makes no apologies for dumbing it down, but it’s not selling enlightenment. Dumb and Dumber To is humour designed for the 10-year-old in all of us. Let your adulthood go for a couple of hours.
HONOURABLE MENTION: Beyond the Lights. A talented, sensitive young musician (Gugu Mbatha-Raw) struggles mightily with the pressure and pitfalls of new-found fame. When a hunky cop talks her off the ledge, only one question remains. Can love save the day? (Take a lucky guess.)
TV
BIG EVENTS: March to the Pole (Tuesday, History, 8 p.m.); The 110th annual Santa Claus Parade (Nov. 16, CTV, 3:30 p.m.)
BIG PICTURE: The North Pole is front and centre this week. Remembrance Day brings the première of the Canadian documentary March to the Pole, which follows 12 injured Afghanistan veterans as they cross-country ski over 140 frigid kilometres. Their goal? To reach the North Magnetic Pole. Meanwhile, Kris Kringle makes his 2014 debut at the Santa Claus Parade. This year’s tinsel-laden affair will feature a Corner Gas “cast reunion” float to commemorate the pending movie. Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment is also debuting floats for its sports franchises. (I can’t be the only one hoping the Toronto Raptors’ float consists of Jeff Goldblum and Sam Neill being chased around a cage by a pack of velociraptors.) I can already picture the Toronto Maple Leafs float: a group of wild-eyed fans, clad in soiled jerseys, sitting on a flatbed truck trying to build a time machine out of hockey sticks, Tim Hortons cups, old Maple Leaf Gardens seats and Wendel Clark’s heart (not literally, but I assume he’ll be on hand to offer spiritual guidance). After all, going back to 1967 is the only way they’ll ever see their boys in blue win a Stanley Cup.
FORECAST: As an act of charity, Santa Claus will leave a Habs or Senators jersey under the tree of every Leafs fan this year.

HONOURABLE MENTION: The Hollywood Film Awards (Friday, CBS, 7 p.m.). The what now? Apparently, these awards have been around for 17 years. Lending them instant credibility: Star Trek: Into Darkness won best film last year. This industry event is hosted by Queen Latifah. Who knew?
MUSIC
BIG RELEASE TUESDAY: Marianne Faithfull (Give My Love to London)
BIG PICTURE: Sorry, London. Don’t expect any warm feelings. The dark, brooding British icon has maintained her creative voice since the 1960s, and here she pelts out dystopian dirges and confessionals in her smoky alto. Is it any surprise frown king Nick Cave wrote two of the songs and that members of his Bad Seeds appear on the album? Faithfull also gets some creative help from the likes of Steve Earle and Roger Waters. You know an album with songs titled Late Victorian Holocaust and I Get Along Without You Very Well isn’t going to be one to play at your New Year’s Eve party.
FORECAST: If this is Faithfull giving her love, I’d hate to see her bad side. (Don’t take it too hard, London. You still have Will and Kate).

HONOURABLE MENTION Pink Floyd (The Endless River). The seminal band releases their 15th and, so they claim, final album. This is a largely instrumental affair, packaged by guitarist Dave Gilmour and drummer Nick Mason, from the studio sessions for 1993’s The Division Bell. While far from a classic, this one will still inspire nostalgia in all those who’ve enjoyed a trip to the dark side of the moon.
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