A delicious way to give back

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 17/09/2019 (2187 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

With the federal election campaign heating up, I suspect most of you are champing at the bit to hear how things turned out at the big cookie-decorating competition.

On Monday, in centre court at Polo Park shopping centre, my buddy Big Daddy Tazz and I joined forces for the fifth straight year in a no-holds-barred cookie-decorating throwdown in support of Children’s Rehabilitation Foundation.

Tazz, a renowned cookie-loving comedian, and I were among 19 media teams on hand to launch Tim Hortons’ Smile Cookie campaign, wherein the proceeds from every $1 Smile Cookie sold in the city until Sunday goes to the foundation to help pay for programs and specialized equipment for disabled children and youths up to the age of 21.

In each of the past four years, Tazz and I have crumbled in this cookie contest, partly because we never have a plan, but mostly because we always eat our box of Tim’s chocolate chunk cookies before the event begins and suck the pink and blue icing directly from the tubes.

This year, we were convinced things were going to be different. Unfortunately, this year they decided to change the rules. In the four previous years, the way it worked was one person on each team had to paint a portrait of the other person via the artistic technique of squeezing globs of icing on top of a cookie.

On Monday, they announced one person on each team would be the “decorator” and would be required to squirt icing onto six cookies in one minute while wearing a blindfold, whereas the other team member was the “runner,” which means they had to dash over to a table laden with cookie boxes, grab a cookie and race back to their partner, then return the decorated cookie to the box.

When they shouted “Go!” the scene in the mall’s centre court resembled a European soccer riot, only with a greater potential for violence. There I was, a 310-pound newspaper columnist, elbows thrust out like Dustin Byfuglien, attempting to fight my way through a crowd of much-smaller media persons, all of whom were bouncing off me like dodgeballs on an elementary school playground, which resulted in us only decorating four of our six cookies.

Before I reveal the thrilling conclusion of this battle, I will point out that last year, the campaign raised $124,000 for the foundation to pay for specialized equipment — everything from adaptive bicycles and lightweight wheelchairs to iPads to help kids learn and communicate with their families — and inclusive leisure programs.

“We would love to raise $150,000 this year,” Christine Schollenberg, the foundation’s executive director, told me, noting that, along with visiting a local Tim’s, cookie lovers can pre-order Smile Cookies and have them delivered by calling the foundation at 204-258-6700.

“As of today, we have 9,000 cookies pre-ordered,” she said. “We have our own delivery service. We have teams of volunteers delivering cookies. You have to order a minimum of two dozen, and they’re a buck a cookie. It’s a great way to thank anyone who’s special in your life, like your dentist.”

The judging in Monday’s cookie slugfest was handled by foundation youth ambassador Alyssa White, 14, a high-energy, always-smiling Grade 9 student at Glenlawn Collegiate who was born with spina bifida.

“I used to walk with a walker, but now I use my wheelchair all the time,” Alyssa told me. “I have less mobility in my legs and hips and spine. I just started using my wheelchair every day for the last two weeks. Before that, I was walking with the walker and using my wheelchair halftime. My hips started to act up.”

With a little help from the foundation, which she first visited at the age of three months, Alyssa hasn’t let her condition slow her down.

“I’m an athletic, positive girl,” she said, flashing her trademark smile. “My favourite sport is sledge hockey. I recently made the women’s national team for sledge hockey. I’m a winger. The foundation has made a huge difference in my life.

“Go buy Smile Cookies! It helps lots of kids like me. I’m just a regular kid. I just do different sports than you. My disability doesn’t define me for who I am; my personality defines me for who I am.”

Speaking of cookies, I’d love to tell you that Tazz and I were victorious, but I’m not supposed to lie. When it came to judging, Alyssa awarded the coveted Smile Cookie Cup to Kiss 102.3 morning hosts Drew Kozub and Karly Troschuk because they dressed up one of their cookie faces with a teeny-tiny Winnipeg Jets jersey.

“Woooohoooo!” Drew bellowed when it was announced he and Karly had claimed the title for the second straight year. “I am feeling all of the emotions right now. We cleaned off a space on top of the microwave so the trophy has a very special home.”

Chimed in Karly: “I thought a little Jets jersey only made sense. I feel ecstatic. Drew hugged me, and we never hug.”

My team’s big problem came when someone accidentally touched Tazz’s hand, which caused him to squirt pink icing all over the table because, in his blindfolded state, he thought it was me handing him a cookie to decorate.

“If it was a table-decorating contest, we might have won,” my buddy explained. “Next year, we could not show up and we’d probably do better than we did. We’d do better if we showed up on the wrong day.”

But it’s not about winning. It’s about buying lots of Smile Cookies, which, even if they crumble under the pressure, are always delicious.

doug.speirs@freepress.mb.ca