The lowdown on anklesock cyberbullies

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 14/06/2024 (838 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

First, we were accused of not being able to own a home because of avocado toast, by boomers who bought their first houses for $7.

Now we have gen Zs cyberbullying us about our skinny jeans and side parts and “being cringe.”

Why is everyone so obsessed with millennials?

Lately, members of gen Z have been nipping at our ankles. Specifically our ankle socks. Apparently, ankle socks are a dead giveaway that you are both a ”millennial” and “old.”

My sweet darling babies: I am 39 years old. This is not a gotcha. I am (relatively) old! I have never been this old before and hope to one day be much older! Enjoy your sock tans!

When I was in my 20s, I can confidently say I never once thought about the sock preferences of my gen X forebears. In fact, I don’t think I really thought about them at all — even though I definitely listened to all their music and definitely aped all their fashion trends.

We millennials owed a debt to them, is what I’m saying, but we didn’t know that because we were young, and a cornerstone of being young is thinking you’ve discovered trends that have already been around the block once or twice before.

So I say let ‘em. Let gen-Zers think they’re discovering chunky ankle socks and Y2K fashion (sorry, “esthetic”). Let them slyly rebrand the music and American Apparel leggings of my college years as “indie sleaze,” a phrase we did not use. They will be putting a bird on everything before too long.

Same as it ever was. Plus ça change. Sands through the hourglass.

And then one day they’ll be 39 years old and gen alphas will be busy making BleepBlorps mocking them for not wearing the right kind of gas mask in the climate wars or whatever.

I do admire that The Youths of today have rejected the tyranny of millennial fashion norms. When millennials came of age, Stacy London was telling us what not to wear and magazines were telling us how to “camouflage” our “problem areas.”

There was a real premium placed on our clothing being flattering, which almost always meant slimming. We were told side parts were slimming. We were told showing a bit of ankle was slimming. We were told skinny jeans were slimming. It’s right there in the name.

Gen Zs, meanwhile, are much more willing to embrace baggier silhouettes and Crocs and socks with sandals and things that don’t necessarily pay mind to “flattery.”

They are dressing more for themselves, sure, but that’s also what’s trendy among their age group. Anti-fashion is fashion again, which is simply another cycle repeating itself. Grunge was also anti-fashion that became fashion.

But this whole ankle-sock obsession suggests they haven’t quite rejected the idea that life ends at 30. So much of the criticism hinges on these socks, these sideparts, these jeans making people look — quelle horreur — old. Or their age.

And that belief, like the belief that clothing must always “flatter,” is a limiting prison. Growing old is a privilege, not just because it’s obviously preferable than the alternative, but because you get to age out things like caring about what the young’uns think about your socks …. eventually.

jen.zoratti@winnipegfreepress.com