Catholic synod won’t discuss same-sex relationships

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This article was published 22/10/2024 (324 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

ROME — Like many gay Canadian Catholics, “Steven” — not his real name — was disappointed to learn a fuller acceptance of same-sex relationships would not be on the agenda during the Roman Catholic Church’s synod of bishops this month.

The topic was originally earmarked as one to explore during this month’s Synod on Synodality in Rome, after worldwide consultation with Catholics three years ago.

Fearing it might cause disunity in the synod, and the wider church, the topic was shunted off to a study group designed to explore “controversial” topics such as LGBTTQ+ welcome and affirmation.

The group, which was set up to study the “shared discernment of controversial doctrinal, pastoral and ethical issues,” is to report its findings to Pope Francis next year.

“I suppose we who are in the queer community should feel relief that the question of greater acceptance of our community has not been totally discarded,” said Steven, a closeted pastoral worker at a Catholic church in Canada. He asked not to say where for fear of being fired.

Steven said there is a long history in the Catholic Church of ignoring the recommendations of its constituted commissions and study groups. They can “become graveyards for issues that church leadership does not want to confront,” he said.

The reluctance of the church to deal openly with the question of greater acceptance of LGBTTQ+ Catholics is something that saddens him.

He cited an archdiocese that invited its members to share issues they wanted discussed — and one topic came up more than any other.

“Mothers and fathers, sisters and brothers, and gay and lesbian people themselves spoke out passionately, pleading with the archdiocese to take a more welcoming position towards Catholics who are gay,” he said.

When it came to recommending ways to follow up, the topic was quietly put aside, Steven said.

As a result, “queer Catholics have learned not to expect much from the Catholic Church,” he stated.

At the same time, Steven feels great sympathy for Pope Francis, who is trying to hold a very diverse church together. This includes Catholics in Africa, where bishops have said they are opposed to being more affirming of same-sex relationships.

“Most of my Catholic gay and lesbian friends have simply given up the fight,” Steven said, admitting he sometimes feels like “a great coward and hypocrite” for staying in the church.

“I keep telling myself that some of us have to stay, that the church can be a great force for good, and that any change that will happen in the church will need to come from within. But that excuse is less and less satisfying.”

While some quietly stick around the church, others have walked away. Steven has seen this cause pain for parents and grandparents, adding it causes them to “question the relevance of official church moral teaching.”

Even worse, Steven says, are gay Catholics who live in fear of being discovered, who hide their sexuality from their family and friends, or who even kill themselves because they can’t deal with the pain.

Despite that, Steven finds reason for optimism in the Pope, who is involving lay people, including women, in the Rome gatherings and promoting that process to every diocese and parish in the worldwide church.

“This holds the potential for the greatest revolution in the church since Vatican II, maybe since the Protestant Reformation,” Steven said, adding that if Catholics take the Pope’s call seriously, it could change hearts and minds on issues like LGBTTQ+.

Steven remains hopeful. The church, he said, is “built on a belief that, in the midst of the total despair and darkness that filled the world at the death of the one whom we consider to be the Son of God, resurrection is possible. Therefore, to be a Christian and a Catholic is to always be one who defiantly refuses to give up hoping, even in the face of seemingly impenetrable darkness.”

The month-long synod is part of a three-year process to help determine the future of the church. Delegates from around the world have gathered to listen, dialogue and discern how the church can be relevant in the 21st century.

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