Haiku horoscopes
Advertisement
Read this article for free:
or
Already have an account? Log in here »
To continue reading, please subscribe:
Digital Subscription
One year of digital access for only $205*
- Enjoy unlimited reading on winnipegfreepress.com
- Read the E-Edition, our digital replica newspaper
- Access News Break, our award-winning app
- Play interactive puzzles
*First annual payment billed as $205.00 + GST for one year. This annual subscription will automatically renew at $233.00 + GST every 52 weeks (10% off the regular annual price of $259.35). Offer available to new and qualified returning subscribers only. Cancel any time.
To continue reading, please subscribe:
Add Free Press access to your Brandon Sun subscription for only an additional
$1 for the first 4 weeks*
- Enjoy unlimited reading on winnipegfreepress.com
- Read the E-Edition, our digital replica newspaper
- Access News Break, our award-winning app
- Play interactive puzzles
*Your next Brandon Sun subscription payment will increase by $1.00 and you will be charged $17.95 plus GST for four weeks. After four weeks, your payment will increase to $24.95 plus GST every four weeks.
Read unlimited articles for free today:
or
Already have an account? Log in here »
Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 01/09/2016 (3663 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.
Aries (March 21 – April 19)
Try to go at least
One more week without learning
Of Pokemon Go
Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
A fatal lemon
Allergy will prevent you
From enjoying life
Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
Here’s a title for
Your autobiography:
Pretty Much the Worst
Cancer (June 21 – July 22)
When death comes for you
You could buy a bit of time
With freshly baked pie
Leo (July 23 – Aug. 22)
“Terror in the Skies!!!”
Good movie tag line but not
Good airline slogan
Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22)
Not sure if that is
A bonsai tree or you’re just
A bad gardener
Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22)
Believe in yourself!
If you don’t then no one will
Join your deranged cult
Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21)
Try to snack healthy
By eating more fruit and less
Shards of broken glass
Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21)
James Franco called and
He’s just calling to say hi
There isn’t a joke
Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19)
In life you have to
Compromise sometimes, like when
Surrounded by eels
Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18)
It’s not polite when
You won’t let the parasites
Finish their dinner
Pisces (Feb. 19 – March 20)
Millions of years from
Now, people will still talk of
Your one funny tweet
