Winnipeg: One scary city

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 31/10/2010 (5424 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

To quote a Winnipeg singer/songwriter of some renown, “Said I’m scared, lordy lord, I’m shakin’, I’m petrified… ”

This may come as a surprise to anyone who goes for lunch at the Portage Place food court, but Winnipeg isn’t the scariest city on Earth. Not even close. According to an online poll, Paris is No. 1 thanks to its spirited, underground cemetery, the Catacombs of Paris. (New Orleans’ ghost-centric French Quarter runs a close second.) 

Which isn’t to say our burg doesn’t have its own share of spine-tingling spots: Take the Fort Garry Hotel, for example. According to legend, a guest who killed herself in Room 202 decades ago now haunts the 97-year-old inn, hovering over beds and stealing from mini-bars.

Given that Oct. 31 is the hands-down, scariest day of the year, we decided to hit the streets, in search of the most hair-raising things in town, even if in name only. Here’s what we turned up…

Scariest tourist attraction

The Witch’s Hut in Kildonan Park tells the story of that famous brother-and-sister act, Hansel and Gretel. Scenes from the Grimm tale adorn the walls of the rounded structure, which was a gift from the German Community of Manitoba, in celebration of this province’s 100th birthday. 

Scariest hairpin turn

Speedworld Indoor Kart Track at 575 Berry St. bills itself as “1/4 kilometre of pure adrenalin.” The enclosed circuit’s 13-Hp go-carts feature Honda engines that top out at 50 kilometres per hour. Which feels like, oh, about 10 times that speed when you’re hurtling around in the dark. (Speedworld recently introduced Glow Kart racing — that is, racing in “total black-light darkness.”)

Scariest burger:

The Monster Burger at the Red Top Drive Inn, 219 St. Mary’s Road, consists of six all-beef patties, topped with melted cheese, mustard, chili sauce, onions, lettuce, tomatoes and dill pickle. The behemoth costs $14.99, not including an EKG.

Scariest writer

Susie Moloney is East Kildonan’s answer to Stephen King. Moloney has penned three horror books to date, one of which — 1997’s A Dry Spell — was purchased by a production company owned by Tom Cruise. Here’s hoping the film version of A Dry Spell fares better than Interview With a Vampire, the actor’s last foray into Spooky, Inc. Moloney’s latest tome — The Thirteen — hits boostores, er, bookstores, next spring.

Scariest movie selection

The Osborne Village institution, Movie Village, stocks hundreds of horror flicks for sale or rent; everything from the bazillion and one Halloween and Friday the 13th sequels, to classic drive-in fare like 1958’s House on Haunted Hill. (Synopsis: There’s a haunted house. It’s on a hill.)

Scariest intersection

Until the numbers are in for River Heights’ shiny, happy, traffic circles, the intersection at McGillivray Boulevard and Kenaston Boulevard will continue its reign as Winnipeg’s most frightening four-way. According to a traffic study, there were 57 collisions at that corner, last year — tops in town.

Scariest entree

The signature dish at Bobbie’s Home Cooking Restaurant, 754 St. Mary’s Rd., is an über-heavy-on-the-garlic number called Chicken Dracula. The Bobbie’s menu states the ancestry of the meal can be traced back to a certain count’s domain, in Transylvania.

Scariest sport

Imagine you’ve joined the Winnipeg Rec League’s dodgeball division. Then pretend you’re the last player on your squad who hasn’t been pegged by the members of a team dubbed Picked Last in Gym Class. And all six dodgeballers from that unit are now taking dead aim at your noggin. Scared? Yeah. We thought you’d be.

Scariest pizza

The Beast is a 10-topping, deep-dish pie, available exclusively at Chicago Phil’s, 70 Donald St. Available in three sizes, the Beast comes loaded with pepperoni, Italian sausage, salami, bacon, beef, onion, mushrooms, green pepper, tomatoes and — burp — black olives. 

Scariest perch

People who suffer from a fear of heights will want to steer clear of the Pan Am Pool’s 10-metre platform. Granted, if an acrophobic ever worked up the nerve to leap off, he wouldn’t stay scared for too long. Depending on how baggy your bathing suit is, it shouldn’t take much longer than 1.07 seconds to plummet 10 metres.

 

david.sanderson@freepress.mb.ca