Soup-er bowls fight hunger

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This article was published 23/11/2015 (3664 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

For me, the most exciting part of the creative process is the magical moment when you unveil your masterpiece to an appreciative audience.

I experienced that thrilling artistic moment Friday at Bernstein’s Deli on Corydon Avenue over a nutritious lunch of pumpkin pancakes with cranberry compote and deep-fried pickles.

Along with stuffing our faces, we were there to give David Northcott, executive director of Winnipeg Harvest, a heart-tugging work of art to be raffled off at the food bank’s sixth annual Empty Bowls Soup-er Lunch on Thursday.

The masterpiece in question is a huge ceramic bowl, in the middle of which are — prepare to be impressed — stunningly life-like clay replicas of myself, comedian Big Daddy Tazz, and our wizard-bearded buddy, the renowned Winnipeg sculptor Jordan Van Sewell.

Rub a dub dub, we look like three idiots in a tub, but David was visibly impressed as we slowly hoisted this mega-bowl out of its protective box. “It’s spectacular!” the food-bank boss gushed, his eyes the size of manhole covers as he ogled our art. “You guys look so chiselled.”

The truth is, every year, we whip up bowls to help Harvest. In recent years, instead of just painting pre-made ceramic bowls, we have descended on Jordan’s home studio to literally build bowls from the ground up.

A couple of years ago, I created a floppy-eared bowl in the likeness of my late beloved basset hound, Cooper, while last year’s version was the spitting image of my long-haired miniature wiener dog, Zoe.

This year, however, Tazz, Jordan and I decided to join forces and create a single super soup bowl featuring (why not?) sculpted versions of ourselves.

The way it worked was we spent about 15 minutes coming up with this genius idea — roughly the time it took Michelangelo to map out the Sistine Chapel — and then we went out for Chinese food, because the artistic process can build up a powerful appetite.

Under Jordan’s watchful eye, Tazz and I turned globs of damp clay into human appendages that looked as if they had been passed through a wood chipper. Then Jordan would snatch them up and — VOILA! — magically whap them into a more pleasing humanoid shape.

Our first plan was to have our clay figurines staring into the bowl, searching for a solution to hunger. That didn’t pan out, so the next idea was to have us facing outward with our backs against the bowl as if we were protecting it from hunger.

In the end, the only way we could be physically attached to the bowl without the entire thing falling apart in the kiln was to have ourselves literally standing in the middle of it, meaning, when you fill it up with soup, our little clay feet will be submerged under a sea of slurpy goodness.

“Physically, or metaphysically, it was the only way all three of us could be attached to the bowl,” Jordan explained. “The message is, first and foremost, we are ‘goof bowls’ and if somehow we can lend some levity to a very serious situation, maybe that can help solve the issue. Who knows? But it’s a very cool piece!”

The best news is our creation will be among 36 unique bowls raffled off Thursday at the food bank’s fundraising lunch, which runs from 11:30 a.m. to 1:30 p.m. at ice level in the MTS Centre. (Tickets are $10 at the door or from Ticketmaster.ca. You get 20 raffle tickets for $10.)

I do not wish to brag, but when Chris Albi, Harvest’s communications manager, saw our “Goof Bowl” she erupted with artistic excitement. “OMG!” she shrieked. “Is that Tazz’s belly? Who doesn’t want to see Tazz’s belly?”

The food bank is hoping Grey Cup week festivities will entice 2,500 hungry people to feast on five delicious soups and try to win bowls decorated by a who’s who of celebrities.

“It’s more important than ever because the number of people we see at Harvest has gone up from last year,” Chris told me. “The number of people using the food bank jumped 3.4 per cent from last March to this March. It was the third-biggest increase in Canada.

“It could be your neighbour using the food bank. It’s not just the stereotype of the inner city. It’s all over. It can hit anyone at any time — job loss, fire, divorce — we see it every day.”

This year’s bowl-making celebrities include: country star Alan Jackson; WSO maestro Alexander Mickelthwate; comedy icon Brent Butt; illusionist Darcy Oake; superstar comedian Lewis Black; TV’s Trailer Park Boys; the Winnipeg Blue Bombers; the Winnipeg Goldeyes; the Manitoba Moose; and the Montreal Canadiens alumni, to name just a few.

Best of all, along with bidding for our bowls, you can ogle the Grey Cup trophy.

“We’re going to have the Grey Cup at the event,” Chris gushed. “Anybody who comes gets a chance to enter two separate draws to win a pair of tickets to the Grey Cup.”

So drop whatever you are doing and come down and join us for lunch — even though, artistically speaking, I doubt anyone else will fit in our (bad word) bowl.

doug.speirs@freepress.mb.ca