It’s OK to have a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day

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This article was published 08/05/2023 (892 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

I had the worst couple of days last week — absolute garbage.

It was one of those weeks where life piled on with a bunch of things. Big things, small things. Smaller than small things. Things that wouldn’t bother me if they were simply just a one-off. You know what I’m talking about. Those days where nothing seems to go right and no matter how hard you try, the day, your outlook, and everything around you just gets more sour.

We’ve all been there.

There’s a book I read to my daughter that I read as a kid. It’s called Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by Judith Viorst.

If you haven’t read it, you should. It’s a classic. I think about and reference this book often when one of us is having a bad day.

The story is about this boy, Alexander, who wakes up on the wrong side of the bed with gum in his hair. As his day progresses, things just seem to get worse, and he ends up having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

He doesn’t get a window seat in the carpool on the ride to school, his teacher dismisses his picture of an invisible castle. He didn’t get the shoes he wanted, his ice cream falls off his cone, he had to have lima beans for dinner. You get the drift.

This kid is bombarded with small things that ruin his day and it’s relatable.

So, as I was saying, I had a couple of days like that last week.

Well, actually it was just one bad day with a couple of aftershock days that followed.

I don’t want to be vague, but I also don’t want to dwell on the things that ruined my day — an unexpected red light camera ticket in the mail.

There was some inconvenient stuff going on at home. Some anonymous jerk on Twitter. A dashed expectation that the day would be better than it started. Little messes on the surface of every table and countertop of my house. Just a pile of small things that really got under my skin and a culmination of stressors that were there and added perfectly to the recipe of a bad day.

There was nothing catastrophic, and I could absolutely count all of the privileges I have against the things that were bothering me. I do that sometimes, and it helps. But other times, like last week, I just let myself go through the feeling. Some days just aren’t as good as others. Some days suck and it’s toxic to try and put a positive spin on everything. (Maybe there’s not always a bright side?), and to go one step further, I think it’s toxic to try not to feel your feelings because the things making you upset aren’t as large as issues other people face.

It’s the worst — and I am guilty of this — when you feel like garbage, and someone comes at you with: “Well, at least it’s not as bad as…” or “There are people who are dealing with way worse.”)

That’s true. But the only way to move past our feelings is to move through them, and to feel them.

Some days, the inconveniences of life, no matter how mild they may be, are just gonna sting a little more. Last week (for me) was one of those days.

I’m glad to say I’ve recovered from my terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. Some days are just like that, and that’s OK.

shelley.cook@freepress.mb.ca

Twitter @ShelleyACook