‘They lost my baby’

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This article was published 02/11/2017 (2953 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Grieving the stillbirth of their son, the parents of Tristan Cassius Mitchell were dreading the funeral Thursday.

When the funeral home called the day before with word Health Sciences Centre Women’s Hospital had yet to hand over remains to lay to rest, they were mystified but figured a few phone calls would straighten out a simple misunderstanding.

What followed was a frantic search burning up phone lines, with both parents reporting HSC staff were verbally insensitive to them, before a hospital social worker called back to say they’d found the remains, “set aside” in a “back room.”

Sobbing, Chris Mitchell said the most frustrating part was, as poor parents without a lot of material resources, they were left feeling like they didn’t count. He described staff as openly insensitive, pushy and even rude.

“They lost my baby,” he said Wednesday before Tristan’s remains were eventually located. “I’ve been on the phone all morning, trying to find my kid. I don’t know where he is.”

Mitchell’s partner, Danielle Morrissette, 29, delivered Tristan, conceived 19 weeks ago and delivered stillborn Oct. 26. He weighed 80 grams and was little more than 15 centimetres long.

To both parents, he was the “little boy” they were looking forward to raising into a man.

The Winnipeg Regional Health Authority offered support to the family for feeling brushed aside, stressing hospital staff are expected to be supportive.

“We take patient relations very seriously,” Lynda Tjaden, the WRHA director for women’s health, said Wednesday.

Twice a year, Women’s Hospital holds services at Brookside Cemetery for parents who’ve lost children to stillbirths and don’t make separate funeral arrangements. Like other hospitals, it follows set protocols regarding stillbirths, often supplying tiny crocheted or knitted blankets, booties and even bonnets.

The WRHA director confirmed it’s the family’s choice to make funeral arrangements, an option not uncommon at the hospital. She said she was aware of no case where remains have been lost, even temporarily, referring a reporter to the independent pathology services contractor WRHA uses for more information.

Diagnostic Services Manitoba returned a call after-hours and a spokeswoman confirmed the pathology division releases remains such as these to funeral homes as a matter of policy.

“As you know, I’m not able to release any patient information… What I can suggest: we’d certainly be most willing to meet with the patient and her partner to review the situation, to hear their concerns and address any matters that might come out of it,” DSM spokeswoman Tara Mangano said.

The WRHA also typically declines comment on specific cases, citing patient confidentiality — but in this case, WRHA spokeswoman Bronwyn Penner Holigroski said the Women’s Hospital was anxious to talk with the family.

“What I do want to ensure regardless of… the story is that the family you are working with has the client-relations information to both HSC and DSM. Lynda (Tjaden) has indicated to me that client relations will be reaching out to the family (today) to follow up as it appears there remain questions they have that are unanswered and we would like to work with them to address those concerns,” Penner Holigroski said.

Mitchell, 45, is a member of the Crazy Indians Brotherhood, a fellowship of former street-wise men who give a hand up to others in an effort to help them go straight. No stranger to tragedy, he lost his 23-year-old daughter in a Winnipeg car crash that made headlines in 2009.

He is also well-known as an advocate for the vulnerable and isn’t shy about raising objections when he sees injustice.

There were problems from the beginning, the couple said. Their phone calls Wednesday only added to their concerns.

“They don’t know our names. They have no recollection of us even being there. There’s no paper trail. Nothing,” Mitchell said, recounting efforts to locate his son’s remains. “I called the hospital. I was transferred three times and this lady freaks out on me, saying, ‘How’d you get this number?’

“I told her, ‘Well, I’d like to know where my baby is.’ She said, ‘Well, we don’t have it,’” he said. “The baby’s gone. I can’t find it. They won’t do nothing. The funeral is tomorrow and I don’t have a baby.”

Last Thursday, Morrissette was induced and the day-long delivery was anything but routine, according to the couple.

The pair said they objected — strenuously and repeatedly — over a medical order to administer an injection of fentanyl, a narcotic hospitals use for pain control but better known for its track record as a potentially deadly illegal street drug. They were so adamant, the hospital staff warned Mitchell they’d remove him from the room, he said.

“I told them there are so many deaths out there, why are you still using this damn drug? You’re telling me (that) you give people a little taste and then send them home and hope they don’t like it?” Mitchell said.

Morrissette recalled being repeatedly pressed to accept the drug. She finished the stillbirth without it, she said.

When the call came that the remains had been located, she sounded beyond stressed out.

“I phoned my social worker from the hospital and they tracked down my baby. They misplaced him. They put him aside,” Morrissette said, delivering the account in quick, staccato sentences.

She said she was treated after leaving HSC at a different hospital for an uterine infection she thinks was related to the stillbirth. She also clearly remembered filling out paperwork at HSC to have the remains delivered to a Winnipeg funeral home.

“They misplaced the baby and they’re just finding him a week later?” Mitchell said furiously. “Either way, the public needs to know… people need to know what this hospital is doing to our children… Apparently, they misplaced him? And apparently they found the baby? They put him in a back room. I don’t know if they even stored him properly.”

The lost and found tale of what happened to Tristan was still being worked out Wednesday night, and it wasn’t known if the funeral would take place as scheduled today.

alexandra.paul@freepress.mb.ca