In awe of Pinawa

Next summer, try floating downstream immersed in boreal beauty. Bounce on a suspension bridge or a buoyant playground. Stroll among tumbling cascades or mid-town deer. Lose your golf balls.

All at pretty Pinawa, roughly a 90-minute drive northeast of Winnipeg.

Floating down the Pinawa Channel is a Manitoba must. Margie and I rent the Dynamic Duo inflatable tube from Pinawa Float and Paddle. Pinawa Unplugged is another option. Don’t fear this adventure just because it ends at Pinawa Cemetery.

The two-to-three-hour journey can be a raucous, jostling event with excited youngsters as flotilla sailors, or a quiet, relaxing drift.

We passed a convoy of cheery, chatty youths floating along with a companion snorkelling beside them. A family on a tube raft then passed us. I called out, “You’re motoring!” The mother — pointing to her daughter propelling them by relentlessly kicking the water — explained “You need one of these!”

Quiet trips allow time for contemplation of the moss and ferns gracing channel cliffs. Towering tamarack trees grow in the water. Spruce and birch trees appear to somehow grow in granite. A mink bounds along the shore and wary turtles bask on rocks. On one trip, three merganser ducks comically dove and wove, keeping ahead of us.

Another excursion’s star attraction wasn’t the turtle we initially assumed it was, but a garter snake. As it slithered across the water, neighbouring tubers yelped. Our daughter shouted “Anaconda!” — beating me to it.

Tip: don’t sleep or float backwards. Rocks will rock you. With a mid-stream boulder looming, Margie strenuously arm-paddled us to the right. I joined her effort only to hear, “Where are you going?” — as I vigorously paddled us to the left.

For snacks, we found extraordinary Sweet Sixteen candies at Pinawa’s Solo Market — Canada’s only remaining Solo. It comprises most of Pinawa’s modest mall and what municipal signs call “Downtown.”

Nerve-wracking crossing

Traverse the nearby Pinawa Suspension Bridge. Although the 50-metre span across the Pinawa Channel is shorter than Manitoba’s Souris Swinging Bridge, this structure indeed swings. It’s wavy, wobbly, clangy, clunky, squeeky, creaky and fun.

After making the crossing, one wee boy refused to return until his large family joined forces to coax him. Then their dog slammed on its brakes. Before too long, a woman yelled, “We made it!”

One couple turned back after a trial run.

He explained, “You feel weird. Dizzy!”

She reported, “I’m scared of heights, but when it also moves, whoa, I’m outta here!”

With fifteen people rocking the span at one point, another woman shrieked, “How much does this hold?” — as we, yikes, clambered partway.

Most folks cross the bridge for thrills and return without exploring the ensuing trail. We hiked until Margie pointed and blurted, “A bear’s big poop — steaming fresh! He’s probably watching us. Let’s go!”

Pinawa offers compelling urban trails, too. Stroll the length of town along the Winnipeg River. Find informative plaques and fun “storywalk” panels. As the self-proclaimed Deer Capital of Manitoba, note that Pinawa is also the Deer Fence Capital.

At Pinawa Beach, Hoopla Island comprises a floating funhouse. I told Margie, “It costs $17 an hour to bounce on the water. Wanna try?”

She responded, “My way is sailin’ on the water.”

I quipped, “But for your CV, you could add ‘Bouncer!’”

Two food trucks serve delicious delights most days. On The Water Eats has burgers and chicken, plus whistle dogs. A sign at Pina-zza Pizza announces “Only in Pinawa: The Crisper” — a pressed crunchy wrap.

Pinawa Dam Provincial Heritage Park encourages visitors to follow paths and footbridges to explore abandoned structures resembling ruins from an earlier civilization amid pink-tinged rocks and cascades. Adventurers paddle here, too.

Water sliders

When Margie had to go make a call in our vehicle, she told me, “Don’t do anything stupid!”

I winced. “Whatcha mean by that?”

She replied, “Well, you know you. And I know you.”

I soon discovered what was causing her concern. Four fellas were taking turns sliding down a fast-flowing cascade. I approached four women onlookers by spinning a finger next to my head while pointing to the daredevils. Turns out, they were the partners cheering them on.

We must save for a Voyageur Houseboat outing one day. And Pinawa’s challenging golf course kept winking at us — although no doubt I’d lose several balls, some clubs and my self-respect. The clubhouse comprises Pinawa’s sit-down dining option — and excels.

Pinawa can be enjoyed by day-tripping, although the Pinawa Motel and the unconventional Wilderness Edge Retreat and Conference Centre offer moderately-priced rooms. Among the latter’s unique characteristics? It displays an electron microscope from Pinawa’s old nuclear power plant.

Another tip: don’t drive to see the plant. You might get chased by security vehicles with lights flashing, get your registration and driver’s license photographed and have your photos of the entrance deleted. On your anniversary.

Not that I’d know.

And, as guards finally let you drive away, your spouse might say, “Turn around! There’s a huge snapper by the road. Go back!” — while still seeing their vehicles and a No Trespassing sign in your rearview mirror. It’s likely best to first get a fission license.

The nuclear reactor is being decommissioned, but I noted to Margie after we went tubing, “Look! My ears turned radiant red overnight. I think they’re radioactive.”

“They’re sunburned,” she said.

gordmackintosh9@gmail.com