Playing Santa to the pets my holiday jam

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 21/11/2017 (3176 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

This may come as a surprise, but I don’t have a lot of holiday traditions.

No, I just do the same old stuff year after year after year. One of the things I do every year is dress up in a sweltering red-velvet suit to portray Jolly Old St. Nick at the first of two Pet Pics with Santa Paws fundraisers in support of the Winnipeg Humane Society.

Every year for the past 11 years, I have spent four hours sweating like a Butterball turkey inside that (bad word) suit having my photo taken with hundreds of jittery dogs and cats, not to mention the odd snake the size of a firehose or a large exotic bird with a bad attitude and a beak capable of cracking walnuts and/or Santa’s vital appendages.

So there I was on Sunday, sitting on the throne of Santa’s Village in the atrium of the Winnipeg Free Press building, which is where Pet Pics is being held, doing my best to be extremely jolly underneath several layers of cat hair and dog drool.

Usually when I write about this animal-intensive event, I make a lot of lame holiday jokes — and I plan on doing that today — but first I wanted to take a moment and tell you how much I enjoy portraying Santa for other people’s pets.

The truth is, I love doing this. It kicks off the holiday season for me and transforms me from an overweight cranky newspaper columnist into an overweight cranky newspaper columnist with a silly smile on his face.

At some point during Pet Pics, I always feel like the Grinch Who Stole Christmas at the precise point when the green-skinned grouch’s tiny Grinch heart triples in size and the true meaning of Christmas shines through.

No matter how tired I am, or how sweaty, or how grumpy, it always makes me feel warm and fuzzy and festive to see how much Winnipeggers love their pets. They love them so much that they are willing to dress their pets, and most often themselves, in holiday sweaters so bright they can be seen from the International Space Station, then stand in line for a chance to capture a goofy holiday memory that will make them smile (and sometimes become misty-eyed) for years to come.

On Sunday, we had hundreds of dogs and cats, almost all of which were festooned with novelty reindeer antlers and collars adorned with festive bows and jingle bells. Fortunately for Santa, there weren’t any potentially lethal pets, such as snakes or spiders, although there was one tiny sugar glider, a sort of flying possum that glides around trees in tropical areas thanks to a flap of skin between its teensy wrists and ankles.

“Ooh, do not let that little guy get lost in your beard, Santa,” is what one of my elves warned as the sugar glider’s parents plopped themselves down on Santa’s throne.

On the opposite end of the size spectrum, there was an English mastiff that was as big as a grizzly bear, but with a heart of gold.

This oversized dog was so friendly that he excitedly inserted his massive tongue up Santa’s nose, tickling his brain to the point where St. Nick (OK, I’m talking about myself) could no longer remember how to do Grade 5 math, if you catch my drift.

It was a special day, and Santa was not the only one feeling the love. For the 23rd straight year, photographer Frank Adam was there, donating his time and expertise and passion to provide heartfelt holiday memories to the city’s pet lovers.

“I made a commitment 23 years ago,” Adam old me (a.k.a. Santa) during a quiet moment. “I always wanted to do something for the humane society and I still want to do it. It’s a yearly thing that I look forward to, as you do. It makes me feel warm and fuzzy because I’m able to raise some money for the shelter. It makes me feel proud.

“I should try it one year — being on the other end of the camera. I can’t imagine how hard it must be hanging on to some of those big dogs. It’s hard to get them to look into the camera.

“Cats are harder than dogs because they’re very independent, I guess. They just do their own thing, whereas dogs are very in tune with what’s going on and they like reacting to sounds.”

As always, we had a fun and sweaty time at Pet Pics. The best news of all, however, is that there is still one more chance for you to have your pet’s photo taken with the jolly old elf. The second Pet Pics with Santa Paws event is Grey Cup Sunday from noon to 4 p.m. at the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave. Before arriving, don’t forget to book an appointment online at adamyorkphotography.com.

You get one photo for $15 or three for $30, with the proceeds going to the humane society. Other packages are available. So book your appointments now, kids, because even if your dog or cat gets a bit jittery, it will put a big cheesy smile on Santa’s face.

doug.speirs@freepress.mb.ca