Mocking wife’s gambling losses not your best bet

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My wife and her girlfriends got into some serious betting during the Winter Olympics, and they had so much fun, they carried the betting over into the Paralympics.

At first, it was a kick to see the girls having fun, until I found out they started betting more and more money as the days wore on.

Unfortunately, my wife lost a lot by getting over-excited about early wins and then over-betting on later gambles and losing big time.

I must admit I encouraged her to get into sports betting because she had never appreciated the fun I had with my friends doing it. But I just found out my wife ended up losing amounts into the hundreds of dollars on single races. There may be more lost money she hasn’t admitted to yet.

I was upset, but then she pointed out she’s the one who earned all the money she gambled and none of it came from me.

Then today I learned she still needs to pay off a woman who won some big bets against her and wants her money immediately.

How much did I lose on my own betting, you may wonder? None. In fact, I made a good profit. Still, I wanted my wife to learn a lesson. I pointed out she had to pay back her friend on her own and we still need her contribution to fix the leaky guest-cabin roof at the lake this year.

She replied, “Well I carried both our children for nine months,” and now sleeps with her back to me, if she even joins me in bed. Please help.

— Wife Worries, St. James

Dear Wife Worries: When your mate blows it and they know it, you don’t gain anything by rubbing it in. Your best bet now is to apologize for encouraging your wife to get into sports gambling, find out exactly how much she owes and to whom, and figure out how the two of you can settle these debts quickly — without jeopardizing your sex life or marriage.

Perhaps your wife can pay part of it back to you when she has the money. Or, as a favour to the carrier of your kids, cover her gambling debts yourself and consider it a lesson learned.

If this compulsive behaviour is actually a continuing issue for your wife (beyond the Olympics and Paralympics wagering) you really should consider contacting the 24-Hour Manitoba Problem Gambling Helpline at 800-463-1554 to see what help is available.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I sing in my sleep, according to my new boyfriend, and he says I sing off-key. He’s lying, because I have a good voice and I’m taking lessons to make it even better. He’s just making this up because he’s jealous.

Also, it doesn’t make sense to be a good singer when awake, then tuneless while asleep. What should I do?

— Solid Singer, North Kildonan

Dear Singer: Tell your new boyfriend you won’t believe you’re a nocturnal out-of-tune singer until he records it to prove it. That should settle the issue for both of you. If he’s just teasing you, he won’t go through with the experiment, but if he’s telling the truth, he might be devilishly delighted to tape your voice.

Please send your questions to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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