Curtains for mate’s increasingly risqué shtick

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 24/02/2025 (203 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My new boyfriend has been interested in theatre for years. The problem is there aren’t enough amateur productions going on to keep him in costume and onstage as much as he wants.

So, when I entered his life — a former amateur actor, myself — all of a sudden he had a partner to act things out with. It was fun for a couple of months, but now I’m sick and tired of the increasingly erotic productions he craves.

I’ve encouraged him to audition for movies or TV series that come to town, but he has a big ego, and at this point he doesn’t want to work his way up to decent-sized parts. He’s a good guy, and a super actor, but I get sick of him breaking into different accents and wearing costumes around his house.

I asked him why he doesn’t get back into community theatre productions like he did in high school and college, but he says he’s past that and just wants to be discovered for a movie shooting in Winnipeg. I know that would really turn him on, but he’s out of practice.

— Not His Stage Partner, North Kildonan

Dear Not His Stage Partner: Why are you hanging around with this actor guy who’s got the itch but isn’t scratching it? He needs to get himself into a local theatre group or take whatever parts he can get for productions that come to town. He’s got the acting bug and the desire, so you could also encourage him to get involved in local acting courses or workshops.

Start by doing some research online to find some options for him to get his acting fix somewhere other than home.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My recent love just left me to go live with her former partner — a woman closer to her own age. Apparently, they made up over the phone on Valentine’s Day while I was at work. Her former love owns a shop on Vancouver Island where my girl can work, and she invited her to come out.

She left immediately.

I couldn’t show my emotions when she left because I was still in shock, so she accused me of not caring.

I can’t help it if tears don’t come when your heart is suddenly frozen. I endured two days of watching her pack to leave and I’m feeling numb.

Then a surprise. She phoned me, crying crocodile tears to say she’s sorry and feels guilty, but she’s still not coming back.

She had an underlying motive for calling — she said she didn’t take anything of value when she left, but now she wants “her” dog. That would be my old mutt. She wants to come back and get him as soon as the cold weather breaks.

I phoned her back and told her there was no way that was going to happen, as I got him nine years ago (before we got together) and he loves and belongs with me. He’s just fine here, so I told here to get herself another dog.

She hung up on me and now I’m afraid she’ll come after him because she has rich-girl entitlement about anything she wants. She would snatch him in a minute. Please help.

— Dog Dad, Whiteshell

Dear Dog Dad: See a lawyer and explain your situation and the threats your ex-partner has made. You could also give local police photos of your ex and your dog. Make sure your dog is properly licensed and has a collar that doesn’t come off easily including a tag with your name and contact info on it.

You should also let your neighbours know so they can be on the lookout for anyone suspicious around your place.

Then let your ex-girlfriend know the police are aware she has threatened to steal your dog and that they have her photo and know your dog on sight.

Also advise her to get her own puppy out in B.C. this spring. Hopefully this will keep her on her island.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.