Barker, Reed best CFL bets to lock horns

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 18/10/2011 (5160 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

When 26 teams in your sporting spectrum play games over the weekend and the biggest news is the fact that two of the coaches of these teams had an over-exuberant handshake at the end of one game, it further reinforces why many call the NFL the “No Fun League,” and how any behaviour not construed as ultra-conservative will steal headlines south of our border.

In case you missed it, after the San Francisco 49ers improved their record to 5-1 by going into Detroit and handing the Lions their first defeat, Jim Harbaugh, the 49ers head coach, was jumping, skipping and chest bumping his way over to mid-field for the obligatory handshake with the opposition field general, Jim Schwartz, when his enthusiasm got the best of him.

He shook Schwartz’s hand with all the enthusiasm and vigour of a 16-year-old boy who just made a deal to lose his virginity, and followed that up with a left-handed back slap and a dismissive look as he paraded off and went about his arrogant way. Schwartz did not appreciate the overly demonstrative gesture, so he went scrambling after Harbaugh to save face and express his unhappiness with the exchange and chaos reigned for about half a minute.

This most likely would have gone unnoticed if it weren’t for the fact that head coaches, especially in the NFL, are particularly stiff and composed individuals. Sure, many can be emotional and animated during the course of a game and in the heat of the moment, but when they are facing the media or when they are engaging in highly public behaviours like the ceremonial post-game handshake, they are predominantly stoic and rarely anything but professional.

So when Harbaugh is so elated with the win that he almost pulls his sweater over his head Brandi Chastain style and doesn’t have the presence of mind to calm down before interacting with Schwartz, you have an incident that catches the attention of an entire continent.

Naturally, the talk stemming from the media that covers the NFL now, is what would happen if the 49ers were to play the New York Jets in the Super Bowl, and the boisterous and exuberant Harbaugh squared off with the outspoken and abrasive Rex Ryan for a post-game handshake on the 50-yard line. That would be something to pay attention to. So I figured if it’s good enough and newsworthy enough for the NFL, it’s high time I took a look at the eight teams in the CFL and speculate whether this could happen after one of our games.

In the Western Division, Wally Buono, the godfather and king of the Lions, would be an unlikely candidate to either initiate such a gesture or respond to such zealousness. He has a look to him that can be as dark as death if he’s sufficiently provoked, and that would be all it would take to immediately subdue his counterpart. Ken Miller, head coach of the Riders, is too old and dignified to ever participate or suffer such an indignation. I could see John Hufnagel possibly expressing a few harsh words, but once again, not one to hop, skip and jump, wave his hands in the air, or chase down an offending coach. Having worked closely with Kavis Reed however, I know he suffers no fools and still has some of the emotion and temper of youth inside of him, so he would have to represent the West.

In the Eastern Division, Marc Trestman of the Montreal Alouettes is a clone of Bill Belichick of the New England Patriots, so instead of a public confrontation, if he perceived a slight during the mid-field salute, he would just retreat to his mad scientist laboratory and figure out a way to put up 60 points on you the next time he played you. I don’t actually see Marcel Bellefeuille enough in the limelight to make a prediction on his behaviour, and there is no way our head coach Paul LaPolice is going to beat on his chest or lose his cool after an exchange of civilities, no matter how he interpreted it. Jim Barker, however, as we have all come to learn from his network debut this year on The Extra Yard: Inside the 2011 Argos, has no qualms about expressing his disdain for teams publicly and not holding back his thoughts about cities and players.

So in the CFL, in my mind, our best chance of having two head coaches lose it on each other on national television, would stem from Barker quipping a snide remark and Reed challenging him on it. Would it become national news? I think the visuals and action in our game would always speak louder than a minor coaching dust-up that played out after a game had ended.

Doug Brown, always a hard-hitting defensive lineman and frequently a hard-hitting columnist, appears Tuesdays in the Free Press.