Don’t get ahead of yourself in renewed romance

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 05/04/2021 (2019 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I recently ran into a man I used to love. I was rushing, head down, watching my feet on some uneven sidewalk. He was coming straight for me, and said he thought I’d at least look up and see him. Nope. Like a bull, I bashed right into him. I looked up and he was laughing, “It’s you! I guess this was meant to be.”

He and I parted ways three years ago when I went away to university. Recently, I came home with my degree but no first job in my field, thanks to the pandemic slowdown. I always regretted leaving this guy, but my ambitions meant more at the time. He’d caught me by the shoulders and I’d been grinning at him like a fool, obviously ready to kiss him.

The he said, “I have to tell you, I have a girlfriend.” That ended that. But, he knew how to get hold of me.

So, last night (only a week later) I got a call and he said, “I’m free now. Want to meet me?” He picked me up and we went home to his place — through the door and straight to bed. I think I could love this guy again, but if I get a job somewhere in my field, I’ll have to go. What should I do?

— Feeling a Little Sick, Fort Garry

Dear Feeling Sick: One thing at a time, girlfriend. Find out how you really feel about this man this time. Is it real love or just lust on your part? He obviously cares more than that, or he wouldn’t have dumped his girlfriend to be with you again.

Whether you really love him or simply won’t know if you do for some time, it’d be smart to look for a job in your field here. Winnipeg’s a big, grown-up city. If you can’t find work here by the time COVID has lost its grip, there are other solutions. This guy might love you enough he’d move and find work wherever you need to be for your career.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I have a dog who goes everywhere with me, even to work, as I have a handicap. A lot of women are attracted to my dog and I get a lot of fussing at my desk. There’s this young one who comes over twice a day, and it hasn’t gone unnoticed by other staff. I don’t know if she’s just crazy about my dog, she’s into me, or both.

My boss, who’s a cool guy, mentioned he’d noticed — and that’s all he said. Was it permission or a mild warning from him? What should I say to this girl? I like her back, but is it about me at all?

— Likes Me or My Dog? Winnipeg

Dear Me or My Dog: Office romance is not against the law. Since this young woman is instigating the interchanges, just enjoy it for now. If it becomes too much, you can use the “office situation” excuse to cool things off and hopefully still be friends.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I don’t get personal mail very often these days, but on my birthday a couple weeks ago, I got a card and a little present of a cute “fashion” watch with the message in the card saying “It’s about time!” It wasn’t signed, but it was a guy’s scratchy writing. I have a feeling about who it might be.

Last night I had a dream about a guy, and I kind of saw his face. At least I saw the colour of it — brown. There’s a guy I know from school who likes me, and he has darker skin. I like him, too. Should I wear the watch and ask him if he gave it to me?

— Dying to Know, Winnipeg

Dear Dying: Wear the watch but don’t ask him if he sent it. If he didn’t give it to you, he’ll be embarrassed you asked him, and if he did put it in your mailbox, he’ll be embarrassed (but perhaps happy) you guessed. So, just wear it and see if he comments on it and gives himself away.

If he simply asks you if you like it, he could be asking on two levels — about the watch and your feelings for him. So don’t offer a critique on the details of the watch, Just say, “Yes, I like it!” and watch his face light up. Then see if things develop after that.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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