Sweat-loving boyfriend not passing sniff test

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This article was published 11/08/2023 (1104 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS:My boyfriend likes the smell of his own “new” perspiration. The only thing he says he doesn’t like is the odour of “stale” sweat.

I don’t like any kind of sweat.

I just like the clean, fresh smell of deodorant on a guy — so I bought him three different kinds with three manly scents. He ignored them, and said, “I’ll just shower twice a day instead!” No wonder he couldn’t keep a steady girlfriend before! How can I get him to see the light? I always smell beautiful for him.

— Losing Interest in Stinky Guy, Transcona

Dear Losing Interest:If a guy doesn’t want to smell like a forest or an ocean breeze, he might prefer the non-scented deodorants on the market. So, go shopping one more time.

You could also talk to the people in men’s toiletries in department stores about a very mild fragrance, but be aware that what smells mild to your nose, can smell offensive to a more sensitive nose. Everybody’s sniffer is different and your boyfriend’s may be extra-sensitive to product scents.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts:My husband invited his 20-year-old sister to babysit our beautiful home while we stayed up at our cabin with the kids, for the month of August. I was seriously worried about break-ins, and the state of the pool water while we’d be away.

I also have a friend next door who volunteered to quietly oversee the pool area from her upstairs windows for me while my sister-in-law was staying there, to keep an eye on who comes and goes.

Well, she just called me with the first negative report, and I’m shocked! My sister-in-law and three of her favourite girlfriends are staying there every single night! I didn’t say she could have any other people living at our home.

I know those girls by description, and they all work together at a nearby restaurant. Apparently they come over when they get off shift, jump in the pool, and then start doing laps. Then they barbecue and hang out in the big recliner chairs by the pool, and drink cocktails.

My husband finds the situation “un-shocking” and refuses to phone his sister to set her straight about what is not allowed in our house — like her crazy friends! If I call, his sister, who easily takes offence, will no doubt quit. Still, that call needs to be made, so her brother should do the calling, right?

— Upset Homeowner, northwestern Ontario

Dear Upset:To be realistic, the top reason an employed young person wouldn’t mind looking after a relative’s precious house for an entire summer month might be to use their beautiful pool. But would she really want to use the pool all alone, for a whole month? Not likely! In your sister-in-law’s case, she’d probably prefer to go to the beach on days off and weekends and enjoy the summer freely with her friends.

Even if your husband does make the phone call to bawl his younger sister out for having friends stay over, you will no longer have a friendly relationship with her. That will also mean you’ll have to cut your family’s lake experience short or come home on your own to mind your house.

On the other hand, you could turn a blind eye to the girlfriends having an extended sleepover at your place — and also keeping it safe. You should also note they don’t seem to be bringing other people over.

Next year, you can do things differently. Hire a house-sitting company, which may not be cheap but certainly suit your personality better.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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