High on the nog Mixologists craft concoctions to convince reporter traditional holiday drink doesn’t stink By: AV Kitching Posted: 5:37 PM CST Tuesday, Dec. 10, 2024

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I love cocktails. I love expertly mixed drinks, distinct flavours cleverly layered so they meld into one delicious and well-balanced beverage.

I love all kinds of cocktails — except the ones made with cream and milk.

You can keep your Baileys and your Mudslides, your White Russians and your Alexanders, and leave me to my Death in the Afternoon.

At this time of year, cocktails are often rich and creamy. They also tend to feature my most hated drink ingredient of all time: eggnog.

The very thought of sipping on an creamy, eggy boozy concoction makes me heave.

Is it the drink’s viscosity? The combination of ingredients that really should only appear in a cake, not a beverage? The fact that it contains egg yolk, which I am happy to eat boiled or poached but just cannot stomach in a glass? Whatever it is, I abhor the drink. Even typing the word makes me want to throw up.

No. Thank. You. I’ll pass on that glass of gloop.

But, in the spirit of Christmas, traditionally when this medieval British invention takes its place in the limelight, I’ve addressed my aversion to a drink beloved by the Dutch (they call it Advocaat), Venezuelans, Trinidadians (both places refer to it as ponche crema) and Manitobans, including the Free Press’s Jen Zoratti and Eva Wasney, who reviewed five non-alcoholic supermarket versions last year.

Calling on local bartenders/mixologists to create two drinks — one alcoholic and one non-alcoholic — to change my mind, I was excited and trepidatious in equal parts when three took me up on the challenge.

And so, armed with Lactaid pills, I set off to sample six glasses of creamy, eggy beverages. This was going to be quite the challenge.

The Free Press Eggnog Challenge

The Task

Make two eggnog-forward drinks: one cocktail and one mocktail.

The Twist

The drinks cannot contain lemonade, so no snowballs allowed.

The Contenders

Phil Tessier from Patent 5, Dylan Pereira from Darling Bar, Jade Janzen from Bonnie Day

The Rules

Eggnog must be house-made. It cannot be store-bought.

Drinks must be prepared in front of us.

Other citrus mixers are acceptable.

Judging Criteria

Cocktails were rated on balance of flavours, taste, originality, mouthfeel, simplicity and presentation. Bonus points if the drink included any of my favourite liqueurs: Amaretto, Frangelico or Nocino.

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Patent 5, 108 Alexander Ave.

Contender: Phil Tessier

Cocktail: JägNög

What’s in it: House-made Jägermeister; Licor 43; rich vanilla syrup; house-made eggnog; fresh grated nutmeg and cinnamon-stick garnish

They say: “It’s a unique creamy, sweet, herbal drink with a touch of bitterness. This is a more sophisticated version of a holiday drink I used to make in my party days.”

We say: An innocuous-looking cocktail, this is pleasant at first but its buttery softness is swiftly knocked out by the vegetal might of the homemade Jägermeister. If Tessier was attempting to hide the eggyness of the nog, he succeeded. It’s been more than 20 years since I’ve had a taste of Jäger and just a whiff of this pungent drink reminded me why I haven’t touched the German digestif for that long. It may indeed be a more “grown-up” version of Tesssier’s “sloppy drink of teenagehood,” but I couldn’t drink more than a couple of sips.

 

Mocktail: Working Late Espresso Nögtini

What’s in it: House-made eggnog, freshly poured espresso, fresh grated nutmeg and espresso bean garnish

They say: “Sabrina Carpenter’s Espresso song has been stuck in my head for too long and I’ve been working too many nights so I made this one for myself as a wake-me-up one late night. It did the trick.”

We say: Heavenly. Eggy coffee can certainly take some getting used to but this is so much more than that. Silky and smooth, it’s a luxurious drink with none of the eggy taste, or smell, I associate with eggnog.

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Darling Bar, 171 McDermot Ave.

Contender: Dylan Pereira

Cocktail: Flipped Off

What’s in it: Baileys, creme de cacao, Buffalo Trace bourbon, amaretto, absinthe, peach apricot bitters, one whole egg, nutmeg for garnish

They say: “It’s like a chocolate milkshake with a complex flavour profile to make it an adult’s drink. It’s a riff on a Brandy Alexander.”

We say: Pereira is clever. This is an eggnog flip, really, rather than a cocktail containing eggnog, but I’ll forgive him, as the Baileys does what cream or milk would do in a nog. It’s fresh and floral on the nose before easing into the smoky bourbon and nutty amaretto flavours. The absinthe is inspired — that first hit runs beneath all the other velvety textures of the drink, reminding you this is very much for grown-ups. A drink you want to spend time with, this is dangerously good.

 

Mocktail: If It Looks Like an Eggnog

What’s in it: Egg, milk, heavy cream, nutmeg for garnish

They say: “If you want a non-alcoholic eggnog drink then this is the one for you. I’ve made a traditional eggnog. The way I see it, you’d order this drink because you like the taste.”

We say: No. No. No. The whole thing tastes of egg. The less said about it the better.

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Bonnie Day, 898 Westminster Ave.

Contender: Jade Janzen

Cocktail: Nogjito

What’s in it: White rum, Jamaican rum, Cointreau, eggnog, spiced pecan walnut orgeat, soda water, mint leaves

They say: “A light and refreshing tropical take on another creamy holiday beverage.”

We say: A brawl in a glass, the flavours fight for dominance while I try my best to steer clear of the punches. But taste, as I am oft-reminded, is subjective and what may be an insult to my palate seems to bring joy to one Bonnie Day regular who, after seeing Janzen make us this drink, requested one for herself, sipping the orange-tinged froth with alacrity. “It’s creamy, tangy and it’s festive. Seeing it being made made me want one.” To which I say: there’s no accounting for taste/to each their own.

Mocktail: What’s Up, Doc?

What’s in it: Non-alcoholic Amaro; eggnog; carrot juice; spiced pecan walnut orgeat

They say: “It’s a delicious slice of carrot cake in a glass.”

We say: The fiendish Janzen truly has created the liquid version of a carrot cake. It’s an earthy drink, the root vegetable holding its own against the eggnog. It tasted exactly like carrot cake right down to the creamy frosting which, unfortunately for Janzen, is where I draw the line.

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Most egg-cellent winners

Cocktail: Darling Bar’s Flipped Off

Perfectly balanced with great depth of flavour, this is a complex drink made with care. If you haven’t been to Darling yet, run don’t walk. The cocktail is available by request for a limited time only.

Mocktail: Patent 5’s Working Late Espresso Nögtini

Unctuous and decadent while remaining simple and elegant, this is the perfect festive morning drink. Who knows, I might ditch my Christmas mimosa for one of these on the 25th. Maybe.

Make it yourself

Flipped Off

Ingredients:

• 1 oz Baileys Irish Cream
• 1 oz crème de cacao
• 3/4 oz Buffalo Trace bourbon
• 1/4 oz amaretto
• 2 dashes of absinthe
• 2 dashes of peach apricot bitters (orange bitters would be a good substitute)
• 3 dashes of vanilla extract
• 1 egg
• Nutmeg for garnish

Method:

Add all ingredients, except the nutmeg, and dry shake to whip the contents together. Add ice and wet shake. Double strain into a chilled coupe glass. Garnish with fresh grated nutmeg.

 

Working Late Espresso Nogtini

Ingredients:

• 3 1/2 oz homemade or store-bought eggnog
• 1 oz freshly poured espresso
• Ice
• Fresh grated nutmeg and espresso bean garnish

Method:

First fill the shaker with eggnog then add in the fresh espresso and some ice. Shake and strain into a glass. Garnish with fresh grated nutmeg and espresso bean garnish.

av.kitching@freepress.mb.ca