Take the high road in dealing with mouthy brother

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This article was published 12/08/2020 (2199 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I have a brother who’s driving me nuts. I’d like to fight him like we did when we were younger.

Since starting high school a year ago, he has learned to use his mouth as a weapon and he does it in front of my friends and our younger brother at home.

He has a mean, dirty mouth and I can’t bring myself to say the vulgar things he has no trouble saying about me being fat! I think if I decked the little runt just once he’d learn to shut his mouth.

My parents have forbidden violence, but he has a terrible mouth. The minute I am finished Grade 12, I’m out of here — moving to a city to go to university to get away from this family.

He is too stupid to get the grades to go, so he won’t be following me anywhere.  Meanwhile I have one year to go. Please help! — Wanting To Pound His Face, Southeastern Manitoba

Dear Wanting to Pound: Shine a light on his behaviour to your most sympathetic parent, rather than just saying he’s got a mean mouth and you want to hit him.

Talk to your parents openly, telling them the exact ugly words your brother says, even swear words.

Can you figure out what makes him so vicious towards you? Besides being smarter, are you better at gaming or have more friends? Most importantly: Are you the preferred son?

Your parents may understand what’s going on and be able to help. If not, try to line up time with a school counsellor as soon as you’re setting up Grade 12 studies.

You’re clearly at your wit’s end, so look for help wherever you can find it, starting now.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m 24, broke up with my girlfriend last February and was looking forward to finding a new lady.

At first I was dealing with COVID-19 quite well, doing everything I was supposed to do but feeling pretty lonely.

Now I’m bored stiff and feeling rebellious and reckless. I want to go out with my friends and party hearty.

I just heard most people think the world will not go back to normal until there’s a vaccine. What can I do until then? — Lonely and Depressed, Osborne Village

Dear Lonely and Depressed: Some singles have gotten very busy online meeting people from other cities and provinces, and even other countries, because meeting each other can’t be immediate anyway and may take a good while.

You’d have lots of time to save up ticket money if you wanted to meet face-to-face, not just online and via apps like Zoom.

As for seeing people socially now, many people — maybe like you — don’t want to get together if you have to wear masks and keep disinfecting your hands.

Many people were up for masks in the beginning but are slacking now, though it’s too early to slack off, especially with parties and adding to crowds of any kind.

None of this means you can’t go out. Restaurants are socially distancing the tables to two metres and outdoor venues in fresh air with small groups are a pretty safe bet if you don’t drink too much and end up shoulder to shoulder, like too many do.

You can still go out, and you should go out, as you are falling into a depression and you know the cause.

Just keep some distance and sit down with a few friends, rather than gathering in a close-talking group.

Good luck to you. It’s isn’t easy being single these days!

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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