A keen eye

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This article was published 23/11/2024 (664 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

The absence of the distinct whirring of the electric sewing machine is the first thing Kirsten Benidickson notices when she returns to the house she grew up in.

It’s the sound she associates the most with coming home to her mother, Shirley.

The sewing machine lived in a room right on the top of the stairs and Shirley, a consummate seamstress, would be in there, busy making her famous Cat Mats or working on items for the Winnipeg Chapter of the Days for Girls sewing group.

“When I would come home from university, she would be in that room sewing. And now that’s the one thing I notice the lack of the most. Not hearing the sewing machine going… not seeing her when I come up the stairs… that piece is missing,” Kirsten says.

“My mom was everything I could ask for in a mom. I could always go to her for anything.”

Shirley Roberta Benidickson was defined by her warm, caring and compassionate nature.

A devoted mother to daughter Kirsten and beloved wife to husband Kris, she was born in Winnipeg on June 19, 1953, to Robert and Gladys McLeod.

She died on May 7, 2024, at home, surrounded by her small but close-knit family.

An artist with a keen eye for detail and a love of watercolours, Shirley was known for painting hundreds of finely detailed, precise, vibrant watercolours of landscapes and flowers, often depicting her daisies — her favorite bloom.

“She always making sure include something ‘alive’ in her paintings, which was usually a small outline of a bird,” Kirsten says. “Our family and her art friends would often comment on how small and detailed her paintings were, often joking about how we need a magnifying glass to see all her details.”

Refusing to be limited to one medium, she also painted in oils, acrylic and alcohol ink as well as pen and ink and experimented in various artistic styles throughout her painting career.

A longtime member of the Charleswood Art Group, she was thoughtful and generous, always ready to share her techniques, and materials with others, group president Deloris Long recalls.

“She was friendly and down-to-earth, If somebody had a problem with their painting, we could ask Shirley and she would explain her techniques,” Long says.

Her generosity extended to Kirsten’s partner Nick, who also paints.

“During one of the first few times they got to meet in person, she gave him a ‘tutorial’ on some of her watercolour techniques,” Kirsten says. “Seeing them paint together and bond over art is a memory I will cherish forever.”

The family cottage in Lake of the Woods provided most of her artistic inspiration. It’s where she loved spending time in nature with Kris.

The couple met through a Winnipeg matchmaker. It was love at first sight and they were married in July 1988.

“Shirley and I were inseparable,” Kris says. “She was kind, compassionate, warm, loving, loyal, true and steadfast. She was my very best friend and companion in life.

“She taught me to be a better husband and responsible father. And helped and encouraged me to accomplish infinitely more than I ever would have on my own.”

Affectionately referred to by family members as Snow White, owing to her ability to attract birds, squirrels and rabbits to the family home, the animal lover was an active supporter of the Winnipeg Pet Rescue Centre, creating thousands of handmade cat blankets, referred to as Cat Mats, for new felines arriving at the shelter.

Shirley continued to sew after falling ill and even on her most difficult days could be found in the aisles of Fabric Land, aided by Kirsten, who would push her in her wheelchair as she chose new paw print fabrics for her Cat Mats.

“My mom loved the idea of making these warm, cosy blankets for cats to enjoy,” Kirsten says. “She especially loved that once they were adopted, the cats would be able to take these mats with them to their forever home so that they would have something that is familiar to them and help them transition to their new environment.”

Shirley’s philantrophy was not just limited to animals. She was involved in the Winnipeg Chapter of the Days for Girls sewing group and used her considerable skills to create reusable feminine hygiene products that were donated to young women and girls in underdeveloped countries.

She also loved crocheting for good causes, donating her handmade items like soft blankets, hats and scarves to community organizations such as Manitoba Palliative Care and Koats for Kids.

Shirley had an infectious laugh and welcoming smile.

Brother Robert describes her as a “truly good person” who made room in life for simple pleasures.

“I was proud to know and be close to Shirley. She had a calm and reassuring competence about her, which, when combined with her caring and compassion, let you know you were in the presence of someone who would look out for you and would be there when needed, with dedication and conviction,” he says.

Shirley’s family remembers her as an incredibly warm and thoughtful person, who had a way of making everyone she knew feel seen and heard.

“My mom showed me the importance of treating people with kindness and respect. She showed me the importance of leaving a positive impact wherever you go, no matter how big or small it may feel,” Kirsten says.

After Shirley’s death, as Kirsten was sorting through her mother’s belongings, she found a clipping of Christina Rossetti’s funeral poem Miss Me But Let Me Go, together with note from Shirley requesting for the passage to be included beside her urn.

Kirsten believes a specific line in the poem, “bury your sorrows in doing good deeds,” speaks to the person Shirley was and the lessons she thinks her mother wanted to pass along.

“This poem has been somewhat like a mantra to me as I have been grieving the loss of my mom,” she says. “It’s a reminder to keep moving forward while still being inspired by the life she led and the positive contributions she made and to continue to do good things in her honour and in her memory.”

The family placed the passage in the niche where Shirley’s urn rests, alongside one of her own paintings of her favourite flower.

“This painting, called Proud, is a watercolour of a daisy standing proudly alone. The title of this painting is fitting, as I am incredibly proud to be Shirley’s daughter,” Kirsten says.

av.kitching@freepress.mb.ca