Sisterly moonlight dip could prove too risky

Opinion

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I love to go swimming in the nude, under the moon. It’s dark, so it’s no big deal, and nobody’s being sexual. My boyfriend holds the towel to dry me off right when I step out.

This year my sister wants to join in! I don’t know how I feel about that. Her boyfriend says it’s stupid and possibly dangerous (come on!) and won’t even come with us to the beach. As if that’ll stop her!

But that would leave the three of us, and my boyfriend will see my sister nude in the moonlight. Is that weird, or not?

— Sisters Under the Moon, Clear Lake

Dear Sisters: It isn’t worth it to lose one iota of trust with your sister or your boyfriend from this ritual that’s done “for a laugh.”

It would be a different matter if your sister’s boyfriend would also be there to catch her in a big towel and possibly sneak a peek at you, but it’s not something you want.

Look, most people would find it a little weird, but you know your guy. If he isn’t attracted to your sister now, he probably wouldn’t be then either — although it’s likely he won’t close his eyes! That’s just human nature.

Sisterhood is more valuable than an incident that could leave you feeling uncomfortable afterwards, so don’t involve yourself and your guy in this risky game.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: This is an SOS from my summer lake rental! How do you tell an ex-lover to stop constantly trying to communicate with you, unless her cabin is on fire and she needs help? Why did she have to rent right next door to my favourite place anyway?

That was my first reaction on seeing her unloading her vehicle at the cabin next to mine, and waving enthusiastically like we were still close!

I actually went back inside, pulled down the blinds on her cabin’s side and hid. What a chicken I still am!

Then I dreamed about her and what we used to do together all that night. By the next morning, her car was gone. I hoped she’d got the message to leave me alone and the coast was now clear.

I was starving, so I took off for the general store — and then I ran into her inside, buying enough groceries for a couple of weeks! She was bent over, reaching down into a freezer — who could forget that back view? Still, I reminded myself she tore my heart out at the end of our relationship.

The worst thing about seeing her again is that I’m many pounds heavier and losing my hair. Sadly for me, she still looks really good. It was embarrassing, but I chatted with her by the freezer, and she made me laugh a few times. I’m still a sucker when it comes to this woman!

So, I’m asking myself, should there be rules for ex-lovers, made largely for people like me, who don’t forget? And what if I make overtures and then she tells me she has a new partner coming up to join her at the cabin?

— Her Former Fool, Victoria Beach

Dear Former Fool: Contact a mutual old friend who still knows you both and ask for the lowdown on your ex’s present love life. That beats walking into a train wreck, and you having to pack up to go home early.

If you want to stay at the lake and take your chances, call a buddy to come up for a few days. It may provide you some moral support if you decide not to try to rekindle things.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.