First & Goal Sept. 30

Iron-fist Andrus strengthening other teams with his trades

By: Ed Tait Posted: 1:00 AM CDT Wednesday, Sep. 30, 2009

1 Nobody asked me, but if Toronto Argonaut head coach Bart Andrus continues to deal away players who defy him or speak out against the organization then expect a couple of developments to unfold if the Boatmen take on more water down the stretch.

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Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 30/09/2009 (5905 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

First, more players will be exiled, just as Arland Bruce III (Hamilton) and Byron Parker (Edmonton) have been, especially if the losing continues and frustrations mount.

And, two, if the Argos give up their best talent for prospects and draft picks — as they did with Bruce III and Parker — expect every CFL team to scramble to get Andrus & Co. on speed dial. Fire sale, anyone?

NATHAN DENETTE / THE CANADIAN PRESS ARCHIVES
If the losing continues and dissension grows in Toronto, head coach Bart Andrus might be forced to make more moves that could further weaken his club. — NATHAN DENETTE / THE CANADIAN PRESS ARCHIVES If the losing continues and dissension grows in Toronto, head coach Bart Andrus might be forced to make more moves that could further weaken his club.

Said Eskimo GM Danny Maciocia after acquiring the former all-star: "He’s a quality football player, a quality corner. We’re excited."

Translation: "A fourth-round draft pick for a stud like Parker?! Are you freaking kidding me?! Wooohoooo!!!"

2 Quite the scene at the end of Bomber practice on Tuesday. A lady dressed up as a French maid was serenading Doug Brown on his 35th birthday in front of the entire team and delivering him cake, balloons and a goody bag. His teammates said afterward it was priceless to see Brown speechless, arguably for the first time in his career.

"I’ve haven’t been the butt of too many jokes on birthdays, but I guess when it’s your 35th it’s overdue," said Brown. "It was unusual. She gave me a rubber chicken, put a velvet rose in my mouth and made me kiss her hand. It was very uncomfortable and awkward — especially because it was in front of 50 of your closest friends and teammates.

"She spoke worse French than I did, I’ll tell you that right now. My Grade 11 French was trumping her out there."

3 Kudos, long overdue, to Paul Bennett and all the people involved for bringing the Canadian Football Hall of Fame Game and induction weekend to Winnipeg last week. The events were a rousing success and last Friday’s banquet, which featured some touching and witty speeches from inductees Alondra Johnson, Rudy Phillips, Glen Weir, Jim Mills and Tony Anselmo — along with legendary Bud Grant being presented with his hall-of-fame blazer by Ken Ploen — was absolutely first class.

Bennett & Co. raised the bar for the event and must have the shrine’s operators contemplating taking the show on the road every September rather than have it annually in Hamilton, the Hall’s home base.

4 Hate to see it happen this way, but veteran hoofer Paul McCallum is now rotting in Vancouver wondering if he’ll get a chance to kick again. The 39-year-old veteran will be paid until the end of the season, but Lions GM and head coach Wally Buono would not honour his request for permission to seek a trade or be released.

"I’m true to myself. I’m not stupid," McCallum told The Vancouver Province. "The second I saw my abilities were starting to diminish I’d say enough is enough; I’ve got a family to support. The way I’ve kicked the last three years and at camp there was no reason for me not to play. But as far as I know I am not getting another chance. There’s no sense me being here."

Added Buono: "I’m sorry Paul feels betrayed but the point is things have changed. My job isn’t to make the popular decision; it’s to make the right decision."

5 And, finally, in our ongoing rant against bad TV commercials during football broadcasts we have a new contender for the worst effort of the season. First, it was the RONA spot where the dumb-ass builds a deck inside his house — thanks to the loyal reader who started an on-line petition to get it yanked, by the way — but now we have one that might be even worse. Anyone else as annoyed as yours truly about the spot where a guy is getting therapy because his mother is, wait for it, a Quizno’s oven? There’s stupid, and then there’s incomprehensibly stupid.