Confront yearning for family with financial reality

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 29/04/2024 (892 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Spring is a wonderful time on our country property, and we’re expecting kittens and puppies to be born soon. My wife is aching to make a human baby as well, but I’m dragging my feet. She comes from a family of six kids, and they’re great people.

The last thing I want to do is disappoint my sweet wife, and what a sexy and determined woman she is! But this has to stop right now, as we just don’t have the money.

How can I get her off the pregnancy project for a year or two, until we have more substantial savings? My mom warned me this would happen, as she knows my bride’s family and they are “very big baby people.” Shouldn’t the animal young ones satisfy my mate, at least for this year?

— Getting Nervous, Whiteshell

Dear Nervous: Bad news, my friend! Young animals don’t drive away the desire for a human child. In fact, their cuddly baby sweetness often jacks up the desire to have a human kid of one’s own!

So, do some quick research into your combined financial situation, and talk openly with your wife about both of you saving up all you can for one year. Then, together, set a timeline for trying to achieve that first pregnancy, so your mate can relax and stop confronting you over it so often.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I was married in May and divorced in May. However, I’m now going to be getting married again at the end of May if my new fiancé gets what he wants. He wants us to go to Las Vegas, which could be a lot of fun, I admit, if we could maybe have an Elvis-themed wedding. But I told him May is a bad-luck month for me. He said, “I don’t care. May has always been lucky for me.” That’s all that counts for him — what he thinks and a big party all about him. He hasn’t exactly said he loves me yet. What do you think?

— Mixed Up About Everything, Westwood

Dear Mixed Up: Don’t waste your time with another wedding! You really need to take some time off from the mating game and clear your head. Love and marriage shouldn’t be about dates on the calendar, and Elvis weddings in Vegas and dumb luck. There’s a lot of shallow thinking going on here, and no sign of love or even respect from this man. Rather than wasting your money on another wedding and another divorce, consider saying goodbye — for free!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My handsome male friend at a local gym has just gotten into cross-dressing. The other day at the gym he was telling me how he’s successfully walking in high heels now. Then a guy I’ve had a crush on, came over and tried to talk to me, too! I rudely turned my back on my gay friend and talked to the new guy, and now I’m feeling like such a jerk. What can I do?

— Awkward and Sorry, North Kildonan

Dear Awkward: Take a deep breath and explain to your gay friend you’re very sorry you were abrupt and snubbed him. Be clear you want to stay friends, you value him, and it won’t happen again.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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