You’ll breathe easier by enlisting legal help

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 05/11/2024 (670 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My last boyfriend won’t let go of me! When my new guy is over at my place, somehow my ex knows. He’s an educated man, but he’s stalking me.

I know it’s him at the end of the silent phone calls, because the fool is asthmatic. He’s harmless, I think, but super jealous and angry, which scares me.

Last Friday, late at night, I knew who it was calling me by the breathing I could hear, and I let my new boyfriend listen, and he started swearing at my ex.

Two minutes later, I looked out the window and spotted my old boyfriend squealing away in his fancy car.

On Sunday night, he was back outside again, stalking me in another one of his vehicles, and I was alone. What should I do?

— Enough Already! Windsor Park

Dear Enough Already: Physically harmless or not, this ex-boyfriend is creating a problem in your life by trying to make you uncomfortable and scare off the competition.

If you get a “no contact” order put in place, the police can pick up your ex-boyfriend if he encroaches on a certain distance of you which is set out in the order. Then they can lay charges. Call a lawyer to help set that up. Or, if you have limited funds, contact Legal Aid Manitoba (legalaid.mb.ca or 204-955-8500).

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: The thought of Sunday dinners starts roiling my stomach on Fridays. I enjoy visiting my mom on Sundays, but my father drives us all crazy. Frankly, he and I don’t like each other, although I guess deep down somewhere, we do love one another.

My dad is a prejudiced man, and I’m married to a man from another continent.

My father also swears too much in front of the children, and he’s ignorant of current local politics and the world at large. I swear he hasn’t had a new thought for 30 years.

How can we make our visits more tolerable? The problem is my mom lives for seeing us on Sunday, and starts baking for the grandkids on Friday. Please help us make these difficult dinners more tolerable.

— Stomach Ache, North Kildonan

Dear Stomach Ache: Your situation is much like working with a difficult classroom: keep them entertained, and things will go well; let them get bored, and you’re in for big trouble.

You need the most difficult “kid” in the room — your dad — to be laughing instead of ranting.

So, before going to your parents’ house, pack up a funny movie and a couple of games. On arrival, put on music you know your dad likes, to set a happy mood. Then set him up to play a game with the children.

After dinner, help with the cleanup and pack up to leave, quickly and cheerfully. Your folks might protest a little, but it seems the grandkids do visit very regularly.

As a bonus for your parents, take some photos at the Sunday dinner visits, and send them over after you get home. Then your folks can use them for online bragging!

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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