Work through new mate’s hot Halloween hopes

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Today, I accidentally stumbled on a couples costume package my crazy girlfriend bought for us for Halloween. It comes with props. She tells me she gets right into the Halloween spirit and the sexiest costumes she can find. I’ve seen some of them from earlier years in her closet. Whoa.

After giving out candy at the door, she says she likes to have wild sex with adult costumes on. I’ve decided I want this with her. I led a dull life before I met her and she says we have to learn to take chances in life. I agree.

It’s trying to figure out what she wants me to say and do when in costume that really gets me worried.

I’m not much of an actor. I’m a weightlifter and just look the part of a warrior or biker, or something tough. My new girlfriend is more of an actor and has some scenes for us to try this Halloween.

I’ll admit I’m scared of what she might want me to deliver. What to do?

— Non-Actor, downtown Winnipeg

Dear Non-Actor: Tell your new girlfriend you might be OK trying to fulfil a fantasy with her that her costume suggests, but you’re worried because you’re not an experienced actor. Ask her to tell you beforehand what she imagines you could say or do to turn her on.

If what she imagines is OK with you, things could go well. If it’s not good, tell her honestly you’re just not into that particular scene. If she’s disappointed, then both of you need a new kind of scene — or possibly new partners.

Not to worry. You can take your gentle nature and muscle-bound physique elsewhere and be popular.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m a single guy, late 20s, and live in an apartment where nothing really happens at Halloween, so I do what I call “goblin calls.” I drop by my friends’ houses in a different goblin mask every year with fancy boxes of chocolates just for them. They love it. I love “giving back” to them as well.

I picture them sitting down at the end of the night and enjoying some chocolate after they give everything out to the kids who come to the door. They often ask me to stay, but I never know what to say. What do you suggest?

— Reverse Halloween, River Heights

Dear Reverse Halloween: Stay for a bit. It’s a fun thing you’re doing for friends on Halloween night. No doubt your friends watch for you to come now.

If they invite you in to hand out candy with them, don’t refuse.

Stay for a bit and have fun, and then move on to the next friend.

It’s a great idea and it’s nice for adults to be appreciated for what they’re doing for their friends.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My wife loves Halloween. I’m from another country and not really into it myself, but I hold the ladder steady for her when she’s putting up lights around the doors and windows, and having fun.

This year I started bringing home decorations for her.

She loves them. But some of my relatives who also live in Canada now think I’m wrong to take part in a pagan ritual. I don’t know what to say to them. Please help me.

— Love My Canadian Woman, North River Heights

Dear Love My Canadian: Try a non-confrontational response, such as, “Oh, we love to do everything together,” and then change the subject.

If the relatives go back to the topic, say calmly, “My lady doesn’t understand some of the ways we celebrate certain things either, but she supports me without question, as I support her.” Then smile and stubbornly keep changing the subject.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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