Witchy woman tries to cast spell on ex

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 31/08/2018 (2958 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I just ran into an old girlfriend of mine at Polo Park and she almost scared me out of my wits. Her hair was white and stuck out like a witch. She used to have shiny, dark-red hair in a long ponytail. She had the wild-eyed look of her old, drunk grandma. She called out my name and came over and threw her arms around me. I thought I was being attacked by a stranger and kept saying, “Who are you?” She screamed her name and tried to kiss me. I put my arm up and ducked.

How could time have been so unkind to her? I look like I always looked, with a few smile lines, still dark hair and grey sideburns. I’m still in shock. She used to be beautiful. We are both only 47 but she looks awful, maybe from smoking and drinking. She wants to get back in touch, and I felt forced to give her my phone number. What should I do when she calls? Should I not answer? 

— Scared to Answer Her, West End

Dear Scared: Tell her you have a jealous girlfriend or wife and that it would be better not to call you again. Then say, “Nice to have run into you and good luck with your endeavours.” That won’t kill you and it’s the polite Canadian way to handle this. You may have some good memories. Remember her the way she was when you were both younger and don’t dwell on this new experience with her screaming and looking like a witch. It sounds like she fell on hard times.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I heard bad things about myself that are not true. I told my parents and their advice is “don’t add fuel to the fire.” Ha! By saying nothing, it looks like I am what these two phoney friends say about me — a dishonest guy in my business. These guys who spread this story were supposedly my good friends. I don’t know who my friends are anymore, except two other guys who are almost like my brothers. What should I do? 

— Angry, Winnipeg

Dear Angry: Ignoring it doesn’t make sense. Sticking with only the two solid friends is a good idea, at least until you sort this out. Ask your true friends if they can help you find out where the story came from. Then approach the people who ran with the false accusations. Seek them out, one at a time.

Say something like “I heard a story about myself that was not true.” Describe the story as accurately as possible and end it with, “Somebody said they heard it from you. Can you explain this?” Without much delay, confront the other main gossip and ask the same thing. That’s the only way you’re going to get any rest. Letting people spread lies about you in business is no way to live — and it’s costly. You may need to go to a lawyer in the end, as saying things that are not true and damaging to a person’s business reputation is against the law.

No doubt your parents are worried about you and afraid of a fight. You don’t need to approach these two people with a a challenge to duke it out. In fact, you could even phone them, if that would be safer. If any readers have had to handle a very bad rumour about themselves, please write in and tell me how you handled it.

If you’re having problems in your personal life, email Miss Lonelyhearts at lovecoach@hotmail.com.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

   Read full biography