Should have been watching girlfriend, not TV

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Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I just got out of bed after a three-day TV binge-watching session of 14-16 hours a day. I needed to hibernate.

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Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 15/04/2016 (3804 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I just got out of bed after a three-day TV binge-watching session of 14-16 hours a day. I needed to hibernate.

I feel great now, like I could take on the world, but I just walked out to the kitchen and found a note, and the place stripped bare of female clothing and domestic things.

My sweet, young, 22-year-old girlfriend had left and moved back to her single girlfriend’s nest in Osborne Village whence I had plucked her four months ago. I am a writer (and also a painter) and regularly end up going into these overload funks after writing and/or painting for 23 days non-stop.

Then I hit a flat-out depleted low and I don’t want to see anyone, even a delicious, wonderful woman like her. I am really sorry to see her go because I really liked her and I am so randy now. Oh hell, I love all women, all shapes, sizes and temperaments.

Now I feel high and excited and anxious to give her a show, but I phoned, texted, emailed and Facebooked her and there’s no answer back. Five minutes ago I sent her two-dozen hot-red flowers. How can I get her back?

— Want Her Now! Exchange District

 

Dear Want Her Now: You are certainly the shining star of your own life. It’s all about your needs, your moods, your work and your recovery from work. Methinks you may need a refill of your medications.

Anyone on a roller coaster of emotions and creative energy with highs and lows like you experience is not a good person for living with any longer than a 24-hour marathon of food, drink and sexual variety.

Maybe you can charm this young woman back for a few nights of fun, but you have turned out to be lousy roommate. Don’t even bother to try to get her to move back in. You would really be better off to find someone new to charm.

Right now you have the energy, charisma and hypersexuality of the beginning of a manic cycle, so dress up and go out with friends and see what happens. Probably lots!

 

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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