Rave romantic review flattering but fraught

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: My girlfriend got drunk and told a bunch of girlfriends the juicy details of our sex life. Well, it’s backfiring on her because I’m getting lewd, supposedly humorous messages from a couple of the women present for that conversation. Apparently my kiss-and-tell sweetheart made me out to be a passionate, generous guy when it comes to sex.

It’s a nice compliment, but it’s only made things uncomfortable for me and I’m really not interested in any other women.

I’m kind of mad at my girlfriend for bragging about me as it’s turned into a very awkward “advertisement” for my abilities. What now?

— Unwanted Attention, Exchange District

Dear Unwanted Attention: Keep track of exactly who has contacted you and have a frank chat with your girlfriend. Stress to her the fact you do not want this sort of attention, and that while her buddies may see their messages to you as good-natured teasing, they’ve only caused you stress.

Hopefully your loose-lipped mate grasps the grief her disclosure has sparked. Then she can tell her pals one by one to leave you two lovebirds alone.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My old boyfriend from about five years ago has just shown up back in the city, and now I’ve run into him at a neighbourhood skating spot. It’s magical and not a super-big space, so it’s pretty much impossible to avoid someone.

On the day it happened, I wanted to get out on my figure skates so badly I went alone to this spot, which just so happens to be where he and I used to practise our skills together on the ice. And of course, he had to be there with his new girlfriend — a very pretty younger woman. Ugh.

I’m married now, and when my husband came to meet me not much later, he almost immediately asked, “Who’s that idiot over there staring at us?”

I sort of cringed, and then I saw the light-bulb switch on for him and he said he thought he did remember him as an ex-boyfriend of mine.

Then my man waved in an exaggerated fashion to embarrass my former mate for gawking, and then started lacing up his own skates. He’s quite a solid skater in his own right.

We had barely done a couple laps together when my ex — a show-off and very competitive guy — glided over with his new girl. He introduced her to us and yapped away at my guy, and then suggested we all hang out together later “because there aren’t lot of great skaters in the world.”

I quickly said no thanks and didn’t make any excuses.

Why would an ex-couple get together with their two new partners by their sides? Yuck.

— Scratching My Head, St. Vital

Dear Scratching: It was a power play on ice — a competitive move disguised as a friendly invitation. You once were his girlfriend, remember? He wants to remind you of his ever-present charms.

Your ex may also have seen via by your body language that you and your hubby were getting off on each other’s company on the ice. It could be your ex has been living under the mistaken idea he was the only prince-on-skates who ever entered your life.

It’s probably best to just take this kind of behaviour in stride by not giving your old boyfriend the attention he craves. Enjoy your new skate mate.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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