Wallet snoop doesn’t deserve an explanation

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 09/02/2026 (181 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I went out with a very sexy woman on a few great dates — lots of laughs, same senses of humour. But the last time, after I stayed at her place on a weeknight, I zipped home in the morning to get ready for work.

When I got home and put my valuables on my side table, I noticed the cards in my wallet were arranged differently than I normally keep them.

She didn’t take any cash, just seems to have had a look at my bank and credit cards. I knew because she didn’t put them back in alphabetical order and they were not evenly spaced like I arrange them. I have been snooped on before.

Now what? Do I tell her I know what she did and get the satisfaction of outsmarting her, or just leave her mysteriously alone after this?

I really liked her and the sex was great, but I feel disappointed. I don’t feel I owe her any real honesty.

— Still Upset, River Heights

Dear Still Upset: Leave this nervy woman alone, and trust your gut. If she calls you — and she probably will — tell her you know she checked out the cards in your wallet and you’re not interested in having anyone who would do that sort of thing in your life.

Say a quick goodbye and ignore any subsequent calls or messages. This type of person has a lot of nerve, so she’ll probably keep calling for a time, but don’t answer.

You can move on and find an equally charming woman who wouldn’t dream of going through your wallet.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m a lesbian and recently ran into the woman who almost became my lover when we worked at the same place together. However, she rejected me before it even could get started and really hurt me. Now I work halfway across the city from her.

She’s been alone for eight long months now she says, and wants to take another shot with poor little me. She’s even been calling and texting me late at night.

My brain says no, but then my reckless heart remembers her dark eyes and whispers, “Hey, you only live once.” Should I let down my defences and see her?

— Tempted, Riverbend

Dear Tempted: Beware the midnight caller. Everyone’s a little more vulnerable when the moon is in the sky and they can’t get to sleep.

If you let this almost ex-sweetie into your life, what can you expect? Likely she’ll be herself and decide to move on as soon as someone more interesting comes along. There’s a good chance she’ll be more careful with you this time, but is that really enough?

Please send your questions to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

   Read full biography