Single student-teacher tryst should suffice

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 20/02/2020 (2077 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I had sex with a former pupil of mine. I knew he had eyes for me when he was in my adult class. Sometimes I would catch him and he would smile that slow sexy smile, no blushing. I got to the point where he would be in my dreams, but was always held away from me by something. 

Now, years after that class, I met up with him in the working world and he said, “Now I can ask you out for dinner.” We went out for dinner and back to his place for what we both really wanted. Since then, he has not called me and I have not called him. But I have been at peace — that mystery is solved — and I gather, so has it been for him. It feels like it should have been wrong but it felt so right, so satisfying after all those years of dreaming and wondering. What do you think?

— Was I Wrong? South Winnipeg 

Dear Was I Wrong: You were teaching an adult class and it is five years past. You may be aware that some high school and college teachers end up marrying their students — not a lot, but sometimes. You two were meant to shoot up one night of fireworks together, and now all is peaceful. I wouldn’t be quick to judge that. Maybe you should just enjoy the memory of satisfying your mutual curiosity and the fact you aren’t haunting each other’s dreams anymore.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I am a faithful reader of your column. I find your advice to be fair, honest, difficult to hear at times and very forward-thinking.

The column about a husband presenting his wife with a costume jewelry bracelet, and passing it off as real, is a big issue. A relative of mine was given a very large “diamond” solitaire ring. It, too, was passed off as real. She found out the truth when she took it to be sized. 

The trust is lost! You have no idea what else is fake and what else had he lied about. You look at the person through different eyes. The marriage didn’t survive.

Keep it up, Miss L. Hopefully people will listen, and rethink some decisions. If they still jump into a situation with both feet, at least you know you attempted to educate them to the consequences, and they have no one to blame but themselves.

— Longtime Reader, Manitoba

Dear Reader: Regular lies are bad enough but the sting from someone tricking you — who purported to love you — hurts forever. Though a relationship may go on for a couple, it’s never quite the same. Even if the person swore they’d never be dishonest again, how do you know the vow meant anything beyond comforting words? They may just be praying they won’t get caught the next time!

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

   Read full biography