Don’t take the bait from vindictive ex-boyfriend

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 12/03/2021 (1991 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I come from a white-collar family and have a blue-collar boyfriend. This guy has taught me how to drive a truck and swing a hammer and help him build.

Plus, he’s fit, and smells like the outdoors — and what an appetite! This is not a guy who gobbles antacids for dessert, like my former husband.

So guess who’s back trying to compete? My ex — the same guy who cheated on me after only 18 months of marriage. I don’t know why I even pick up the phone! But I can’t seem to stop answering when my ex calls. What’s wrong with me? I know I’m…

— Playing With Fire, Fort Rouge

Dear Playing: Think ahead to the day your new man leaves you! He’s not the type to come crawling back like your ex — that snake-in-the grass. Ex-hubby doesn’t really want you back, but he’d just love to spoil what you have with this new guy.

Don’t be greedy thinking it would be interesting to have two men wanting your attention, or else you’ll lose the valuable man!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I want to kick my neighbour’s butt! He has never liked me, because I complain about his stinkin’ little dogs that yip and yap their heads off!

Today, when I was at work, he shovelled snow over the fence, full of winter dog crap. So, I just grabbed my shovel and pitched it right back. Then his wife came out on the doorstep and screamed obscenities at me.

My wife and I have been thinking about buying a new place this spring for other reasons, but don’t want to look like we caved and ran away. What do you think?

— Tempted to Move, Fort Richmond

Dear Tempted: I always remember what my brother (who was a lawyer) said regarding bad neighbours. “If it makes your blood pressure go up every time you look at their property, just move and save your health.”

Why not do that? Some people find places they consider buying, and go so far as to knock on a few neighbours’ doors and ask them about the people in the immediate area of the block. You sure wouldn’t want the nightmare of moving into a similar situation elsewhere!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My wife has a “harmless” crush on a male country singer star, and I’ve gotten real tired of it. So, I picked Dolly Parton with the big assets and started pretending to have a crush on her. My wife is slim and tiny everywhere, and she felt embarrassed and hurt.

Now she’s getting changed in the closet and wearing nightgowns — not the sexy kind. I apologized, but she said, “Too late.” So I fessed up and told her I was just pretending about Dolly — who’s decades older than me — to get back at her. I said I Iove her petite body, and I do, because it is her.

Didn’t work. She’s still on the other side of the bed. By the way, she still has posters up of the singer dude in the basement room and exercises to his music every morning.

I know this is a stupid, immature fight, but it’s ruined our formerly active sex life. We have no children at home because we were both married before and they’re in their 20s and gone, so we should be enjoying the freedom and having the time of our lives. I need help. SOS!

— Big Mouth, Weston

Dear Big Mouth: It’s hard to come back from telling your mate their body parts are nothing compared to someone else’s. Some hurtful words just can’t be stuffed back in your mouth — but you love this woman, and you must try.

Rather than saying you like her tiny frame — which she isn’t going to believe — you’d be better off to tell her in detail about your giant love for her, heart and soul, when she’s not mad. Then confess how jealous you feel of the guy in the basement poster — that she still has up!

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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