Family Christmas best balm for broken heart

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 14/12/2021 (1711 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My heart is already broken this Christmas! My girlfriend and I have been in a loving lesbian relationship for two years, but for some reason she wouldn’t live with me. She told me on the weekend she was going to go home to the farm for Christmas without me, because she felt uncomfortable with “us” sleeping together at her parents’ house.

What a ridiculous excuse! Her parents are obviously fine with “us” now. In fact, they asked me in November on the phone to come out there for Christmas with their daughter, and they know we’re a couple.

I can’t understand what happened, and now she’s says she’s breaking it off. I’m going through hell! Everything is falling apart, and my love won’t tell me what’s really going on. I have no other pipeline to find out the real truth.

My own family knows about the breakup, as I phoned in tears when it happened. Mom and Dad are begging me to come for Christmas in our home town, but I’m afraid I’ll be such a blubbering mess I’ll spoil things for everyone. Today I was informed they’ve arranged for my young auntie here in Winnipeg to bring me out! I don’t know what to do.

Should I go home to my family and spoil everybody’s Christmas, or stay here and somehow get myself through it?

— Falling Apart at the Seams, St. James

Dear Falling Apart: Good families don’t just love each other in the good times, and your family has said they do want you home with them. It’ll be better for everyone that way.

You won’t be crying all the time. Tears often lead to crazy comments that make somebody laugh. Then arms go around you, the food and drinks come out (be careful about over-drinking in your state), and maybe someone starts a card or board game. You’ll get through the rough times together with the family’s love.

Let them look after you. If your family knows you’re suffering alone in the city, they will have a difficult Christmas. So, do the right thing for yourself and them — grab that tissue box, and get in the car with Auntie!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Last year I made a big mistake at Christmas time and gave my wife sexy black lingerie — and it was very expensive, I have to say. She opened it, and said, “Right. A gift for yourself!” Ouch! While it’s true I could hardly wait to see her in the outfit, I bought it because I thought she’d look fantastic and feel really beautiful.

I asked her what she wanted instead, and she said, “You know darn well! It was on the top of the Christmas list I made for you.” I honest-to-God couldn’t remember that. It turned out she’d wanted some fancy pots and pans. Real exciting, but I do know she loves to cook.

Should I buy them for her this year? I still haven’t bought her a gift as I’m not confident I can get it right.

— Loser at Gift-Giving, Tuxedo

Dear Loser at Gift-Giving: Out of curiosity, why didn’t you give her the pots and pans after last Christmas? Make it one of your gifts this Christmas, plus flowers and/or jewelry. Those additions would be romantic gifts for your love, that don’t point directly at the bedroom. Better luck this year, and here’s to a merrier Christmas!

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

   Read full biography