Use new year to connect in new ways

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 29/12/2021 (1680 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I’m totally at loose ends going into 2022, and need some help before I go into a depression. I’m a single guy, well-educated, with a great day job. I don’t care so much for Christmas, but I love celebrating the new year and travel. I usually start planning to fly away well before January, but not this time. I can’t confidently book anything.

I haven’t had a girlfriend the last 16 months either, so absolutely no love life. At night, I’m alone with the TV, working out — for a body nobody is going to see. Worse still, COVID is on the rise again.

For the first time, I’m jealous of my two brothers, who are married and at least have a steady love life and kids. I used to be living an enviable single life. Now it feels bleak and lonely. Do you have any ideas for planning next year? I feel I have no control left over anything.

— Loose Ends, Tuxedo

Dear Loose Ends: Screech to halt! You’re on the wrong path. You could turn things around in your life if you decided to devote 2022 to helping other people. In these tough times, the help of an able-bodied person with a good mind and heart is badly needed.

You have lots of spare time to give, since you don’t need to rush home to tend to a family. Most of the single-guy entertainments have faded from possibility, so stop pining after them.

Instead, look for places you can volunteer and really get involved. Volunteering attracts some wonderful people.

Check out the possibilities on Volunteer Manitoba’s website (volunteermanitoba.ca) and then jump in with enthusiasm (once things are safe enough with the pandemic to do so). You’ll connect with new friends of all ages with big hearts and you’ll feel good about yourself.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: In mid-December, I met a unique guy through my work. We spent three wonderful evenings together having dinners, and two unforgettable nights at my apartment. Then he flew back to Toronto. I thought it was the beginning of something special.

But, when he finally answered my phone calls (I left a dozen messages), he gave me this cool reply: “Yes, it was kind of special, but unfortunately I have a partner in Toronto.” That was it! He said goodbye and hung up.

I’ve been walking around feeling stunned ever since. I have to see him again, as he’s scheduled to come back to see my boss for an important deal. How will I manage? I sit at the desk right outside my boss’s office.

— Sick About This, St. Boniface

Dear Sick About It: You’ll have to be pleasant and business-like, but that’s it. Your mistake was dating your boss’s client, and the client’s mistake was charming someone related to his business off her feet — especially when he had a partner waiting at home. You probably won’t be able to help replaying scenes from the last visit in your head, but you needn’t act on any of them. Let him know his charming smile has lost its power, without outright saying it.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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