Lively Christmas for two can cure empty-nest blues

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This article was published 23/12/2022 (1377 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Some of our friends think Christmas is a big drag, because they don’t have grandkids in town anymore. My wife and I have figured out how to have a blast at Christmas time — just the two of us. Could I share it with your readers?

Our son and daughter have moved away for work — taking our grandchildren, of course. Some years they’re able to visit for Christmas, but when they don’t, we still celebrate the holiday, big-time. First, we pretend we’re tourists and make a list and hit all the fun events and lighting displays in the first weeks of December.

Then, on Christmas Eve, my wife and I dress up in costumes. This year we’re reindeer with bells on and red noses blinking. Then we go out and hand-deliver gifts to our circle of friends — 15-minute stops only, so we don’t intrude. In the van we enjoy treats and non-alcoholic drinks between stops. Then we come home, eat our favourite smoky rib dinner, drink a champagne toast and have some fun beside the Christmas tree. It’s a great night, and we don’t feel sorry for ourselves at all!

We could have been among those who get sad and shut down at Christmas once they don’t have grandkids and family around anymore, but my wife and I continue to make fun any way we can. You can still make the Christmas season bright, even if your big family is down to two people, like us.

— Big Christmases for Two, St. Vital

Dear Big Christmases: A lot of people have had a hard time coping with separation from their families due to COVID and flu. The best part of your plan is that it could work for people of all ages. It’s also a great idea to vary your costumes year to year, from reindeer to snowmen, Santas, or some off-duty workshop elves. Even penguins on the doorstep could be funny!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I just broke up with my ignorant boyfriend yesterday, and took the expensive Christmas present I bought him to the store and got my money back.

This morning I looked out my doorstep and saw a gift on the step from him, with a note that said: “Can’t return this. You might as well have it” with a sarcastic “You’re welcome!” in red letters after that. That’s what he usually says if he doesn’t feel thanked enough.

I opened it up, and it was an engraved bracelet with my name on it — just my name, which is a very common one, and nothing else. He’s such an unromantic guy. I feel like throwing it at him, and saying, “Just find yourself another girlfriend with the same name, and give it to her. Should be easy!” What do you think?

— So Sick of Him! Westwood

Dear Sick of Him: Your relationship isn’t truly finished until the fighting is over. If you’re serious about ending this, put the bracelet in a bottom drawer and stop interacting. Don’t throw it back at him, whatever you do. If and when this relationship really is nothing to you anymore, consider asking a younger woman who shares your common first name if she might like it.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Is it rude to give somebody money for Christmas? I have a nephew who’s really down financially this year. I usually give him a sports-related present. What do you think?

— His Closest Auntie, Wolseley

Dear Closest Auntie: When you’re broke, and you need cash for the rent or food, your closest auntie is certainly welcome to give you money, and it will be appreciated. But, be subtle. Still give your nephew a sporty item, with an envelope taped onto it holding a loving card and some cash.

Then, when somebody asks what he got from Auntie, he can sports-related gift, and he won’t be broadcasting the fact he’s broke.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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