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Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I know I need to go to a psychiatrist but I don't know what I'd say. Would I waste the expensive hour? How do I start out? I have been trying to prepare everything I want to say in my head before I go to sleep. When I get to the embarrassing personal troubles, I choke up. Some things I have never verbalized before. What advice do you have for me?

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Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 04/03/2016 (3866 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I know I need to go to a psychiatrist but I don’t know what I’d say. Would I waste the expensive hour? How do I start out? I have been trying to prepare everything I want to say in my head before I go to sleep. When I get to the embarrassing personal troubles, I choke up. Some things I have never verbalized before. What advice do you have for me?

— Screwed Up and Choked Up, St. Vital

 

Dear Screwed Up and Choked Up: It’s simpler than you think — you just go. There’s no preparation required. The psychologist or psychiatrist will know what questions to ask to get all the different problems rolling out. That is a large part of their training: how to gently dig things out.

 

You just answer the questions the best as you can, and don’t try to guard your thoughts or your mouth. It can all come out in a big mish-mash. You may want to change your mind about things in midstream, or tell the doctor confused stuff, such as you think and feel two ways about the same person.

 

There will be tissues for you when you cry, and don’t be ashamed if you do. People often cry when they start to talk about something meaningful in their lives. During the first visit or two, expect the professional to take some notes, but most often they don’t sit there scribbling in front of people after the initial history. They will write down a few things in a file before the next patient comes in.

 

If seeing a psychiatrist is something you feel you would like to do, be aware there is nothing more important than investing the time to straighten out your own life. It benefits you and everyone around you.

 

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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