Harassment is harassment, no matter the sex

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 25/05/2016 (3465 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: A woman sent me flowers anonymously at work. I didn’t ever want flowers from anyone, and definitely not sent to my office desk. She signed it, “Your Secret Admirer,” in lacy female handwriting. I wish I knew who it was.

I think it was someone from my office because there’s been a lot of tittering and women looking my way. I am relatively young (28) and a body builder. People say I’m good-looking. I overheard I was “a nine out of 10” the other day. Another time I walked by a group of women discussing my butt, and I heard a little wolf whistle. How do women get off doing stuff like this? This feels like harassment.

I would like to take the flowers and throw them in the garbage — they have brought me unwanted attention and a lot of joking from the women, and also from the older men around here. What should a guy do in my situation?

— Uncomfortable and Angry, Industrial Area

Dear Uncomfortable and Angry: You’re right, it is harassment when a guy in the office gets anonymous flowers and everybody’s laughing. Harassment would also be the actions of the group standing around discussing your body parts as you go by. Somebody in human resources needs to pull these people in — women and men — and have a serious talk with them about sexual harassment in the workplace.

Most flowers smell good, but these goes have a peculiar odour to them, don’t they? Because the card was not signed, you don’t owe anybody anything. You could take them to the person at the front desk, and explain you don’t want them in the office and ask if they would like them there. Better still, take them to the dumpster.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

   Read full biography