Colossal sex drive too much for just one

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This article was published 27/04/2017 (3449 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I got lots of lovin’ to give and can’t see why I should stop at one woman. I only found one woman who can put up with all the lovin’ I got in one night — or even three nights running. The trouble is she can’t quit work to be with me.

I retired early because I worked hard and made a lot of money when I was younger. I’m just in my early 50s now. I love that little woman, but last night I had to tell her she wasn’t enough. She told me what I could do and announced she’ll keep me on her list; we don’t have to go steady anymore and she’ll see another guy as well. She assured me she loved me best, but that could change depending on how close she gets with the new guy. I said fine, but then later that night I was jealous as a green-eyed snake.

I went looking for them and found this guy alone at her favourite bar where she goes daily after work. I asked if he was waiting for her and he nodded. I invited him to go outside to break his face and he said, “I’ll be there right after I dial 911.” He outsmarted me because he knows I don’t want any police involvement. When she heard what happened, she called me and told me to stay out of her sight for good. Now how do I get her back, because I may have gone and fallen in love with her when I wasn’t looking?

— Wanting Her Back, Transcona

Dear Wanting Her Back: You sound like a furious five-year-old in a sandbox. You can have the best, shiniest toy in the sandbox or you can have a bunch of little ones you don’t like as much. By offering to punch the new boy playing in the same sandbox, you just lost everything.

Now let’s talk about this colossal sex drive you claim to have. How is it operating now that the spunky little woman you fell in love with is gone? A lot of that sexual enthusiasm you felt had to do with her being who she is, not with your hormones. You better hope she was just teaching you a lesson and she’ll give you another chance. Can you learn to choose the biggest prize and be happy and let the others fall by the wayside? Until you can, leave her alone.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I have a professor in my sights. We’re almost finished school for the year and we have been making eyes at each other all term. He doesn’t have a wife or a girlfriend. How long do I have to wait before it’s OK for me to make a move? I think I need to be the one to try first, as he was my teacher. I know how to win if he’s interested. How long should I wait?

— Grade A Student, University of Manitoba

Dear Grade A Student: Wait a month or two after you receive your final marks, then no one is likely to accuse him of marking you higher than you deserved in that class. Also, keep your lips buttoned about what mark you get. You don’t need any gossip floating around. Once you think it’s safe to start a romance, ask to meet him somewhere other than on campus. If you two decide you want to be together, keep your relationship under wraps for a time. No bragging to even just one girlfriend. You need to protect this man from getting into any trouble whatsoever.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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