She wanted a caveman, where is he?

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This article was published 15/06/2018 (2680 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m a small Asian woman, but I’d like to be a lot rougher with my boyfriend in sex play. He thinks I’m a delicate flower. My ex-boyfriend could tell him I’m more like a venus flytrap. I’m super strong. I like the feeling of strength surging through my arms, legs and body during sex. My new boyfriend is super nice and polite, but early on he clearly hinted he was a caveman in the bedroom. That caveman hasn’t shown up. Only Mr. Wuss! If I show him what I want, I’m afraid he’ll run away.

— Little But Strong, Downtown

Dear Strong: If you never show him, you will be frustrated all the time. He might be waiting for you to make the first strong move. Perhaps he just gave up. Nothing can be gained by faking it any longer. Tell him straight out you thought he was interested in stronger sex moves “like a caveman.” If he shrinks back and looks terrified, you heard him wrong the first time. Let him wriggle away. If he says he was waiting for you to make the first move, then make that first move. Obviously, he’s not a talker, so maybe he’s looking for permission through demonstration. Demonstrate, Mighty Mouse!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My wife is the life of the party at the beach. After building a cabin addition up there this spring, I’m sure that one or possibly two of the (married) guys have a crush on her.

They’re always hanging around her and their shoulders slump if I arrive alone for the weekend. My wife doesn’t wear much at the beach and she likes to build. You haven’t seen anything like my wife in a bikini top and tight jeans hammering a nail. Yes, I’m jealous. How do I get these guys to stop volunteering to help on the build just so they can get a look at my wife?

— Jealous Husband, Transcona

Dear Jealous: Don’t reject the help. Is she interested in them? If not, think of her presence as torture for those guys, and be glad she’s all yours at the end of the day. If the guys are too obvious in their attention, say, “Keep your eyes in your head, buddy!”

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My husband gives me a lot of money to let me stay home and not work. He encouraged me to join sports groups, clubs and playgroups for the kids. He plays tennis all summer and hockey all winter and works for the big bucks. Get the picture?

I just told him I’m going back to work in the fall as the kids will both be in school full time. I am a grade school teacher. He said, “Who’s going to hire you after eight years away?” Somebody already has, and the grade I wanted, too!

“And when were you planning on telling me?” he said, like an angry teacher, himself.

“Today!” I said and waltzed out of the kitchen. I could hear the rumblings of a volcano, so I went outside and got in the car.

My husband doesn’t like surprises and he loves the idea of supporting his wife like a queen — unlike the way his single mother was treated.

How do I get him to accept I want to work at my career?

— Born To Teach, Tuxedo

Dear Born To Teach: Emphasize how happy you will be to teach again, not hard-pressed, or pushed to make a buck to support the kids, like his mom. Explain to him how the plan will work so he isn’t lost in questions and worry. He clearly wants to make you happy as the mother of his kids.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave. Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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