Scorned woman reluctant to stay true

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This article was published 17/09/2018 (2940 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I’m having way too much fun playing around to be 100 per cent true to my boyfriend, who is on a shaky round two with me. He used to be a badass who got around to all the ladies and I suffered so badly from that until I broke into hives.

I dumped him, but suddenly, he’s the one dying of pain. I took him back after three months of his begging and promising me the world. Now, he has calmed down and is just acting grateful and true.

I haven’t calmed down. I’m secretly getting a little of my own back and have no guilt, either, but one of my new playmates is getting serious about me and is tired of sneaking around.

Recently, he told me I had to make a choice. I found myself unable to say I’d break up with my major boyfriend who has learned how to behave himself — for now anyway.

What should I do? I’m afraid of putting all my eggs in one basket again, but I do love my first true love.

— Rock and a Hard Place, Downtown

Dear Rock: The problem in this whole mess is that nobody finds cheating beneath them, not even the enthusiastic new guy. You’re telling me you’re really not ready to be going steady, but still want to give your first guy a second chance?

Be faithful to your old boyfriend, as he is to you, and see if it will work. If he feels really safe, and then goes back to his cheating ways, send him packing for good. Then, call the new guy, if you are still attracted to him, or anyone else on your dating list because you’re free and single.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I have one more suggestion for Plummeting Again, the guy who’s totally depressed after returning home from summer at the lake. You suggested 10-day fall and spring holidays in the sun.

I think he should get a hot tub, if possible, so he and his wife at least have the outdoor and water aspects of the lake right here at home.

Make sure to check out the cedar options, too, where you can also get a sauna. I’m having mine installed in two weeks.

— Party All Winter Too

Dear Party: Thanks! This is a great solution for between summer holidays. With a little planning, Plummeting Again can lift his head up, start saving and set things up so he never has to dive under the covers and cry for eight months again.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: We live in a big house divided into suites. The moaners and groaners who used to live in the suite above us and keep us awake with their caterwauling have moved out. That’s great, but they have been replaced by an overly friendly new couple who want to be our best friends.

We had such a bad experience with the lovers that we really just want neighbours we don’t see or hear. We need a rest.

The woman has been down with baked goods and the guy stopped in to offer tools to my boyfriend, as he has also rented the tool shed in the backyard from the landlord. I just want them to leave us alone. How do we tell these two innocent, friendly faces we want nothing to do with them?

— Had Enough!

Dear Had Enough: Loosen up! If you don’t learn to get over these situations, you’ll mistakenly paint the new people in the same shade of dirty grey as the annoying ones who went before.

Don’t reject them wholesale because of the sleepless nights you had with the previous couple.

Be pleasant, at the very least. They sound like good people, the kind of neighbours you’d want to have when sharing a house. And they’re not overdoing it.

Baking is a customary neighbourly gift that you might have given to welcome them and didn’t. The offer to loan tools was generous and unique. How about a gift of a pumpkin from a roadside stand, to show you’re not completely stuck-up?

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave. Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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