Five kids enough for her, but he wants even more

Advertisement

Advertise with us

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My husband and I have a big family — five kids. I want to cut if off now, but he comes from a much larger family and loves it. He argues my pregnancies are easy and he has the money to support a big family. I think I should get a bigger say than he does. I love my kids and him, but I’m tired so much and nauseous for three months after I conceive each baby. What do you think?

Read this article for free:


or

Already have an account? Log in here »

To continue reading, please subscribe:

Subscribe and receive a limited-edition Free Press branded hat or tote.

Digital Subscription

One year of digital access for only $205*

  • Enjoy unlimited reading on winnipegfreepress.com
  • Read the E-Edition, our digital replica newspaper
  • Access News Break, our award-winning app
  • Play interactive puzzles

*First annual payment billed as $205.00 + GST for one year. This annual subscription will automatically renew at $233.00 + GST every 52 weeks (10% off the regular annual price of $259.35). Offer available to new and qualified returning subscribers only. Cancel any time.

To continue reading, please subscribe:

Add Free Press access to your Brandon Sun subscription for only an additional

$1 for the first 4 weeks*

  • Enjoy unlimited reading on winnipegfreepress.com
  • Read the E-Edition, our digital replica newspaper
  • Access News Break, our award-winning app
  • Play interactive puzzles
Start now

*Your next Brandon Sun subscription payment will increase by $1.00 and you will be charged $17.95 plus GST for four weeks. After four weeks, your payment will increase to $24.95 plus GST every four weeks.

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 22/03/2018 (3072 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My husband and I have a big family — five kids. I want to cut if off now, but he comes from a much larger family and loves it. He argues my pregnancies are easy and he has the money to support a big family. I think I should get a bigger say than he does. I love my kids and him, but I’m tired so much and nauseous for three months after I conceive each baby. What do you think?

— Ready to Stop the Baby Machine, Rural Manitoba

 

Dear Ready To Stop the Baby Machine: Unless he’s prepared to use his money to provide full-time help for you for a number of years, you should put your foot down. A worn-out mother is not as good a mom as one who has energy for fun things on top of housework and child-tending. And a worn-out wife may not be loving the sex anymore, especially if she connects sex with the chance another baby will be popping up.

Also, the older kids lose some of their own childhood by being stand-in parents for the younger ones. Most of the childless-by-choice women I’ve met were the oldest girls in the family, and already had their fill of childcare/parenting young kids before they left home. And they generally left home as fast as they could!

Are you afraid you can’t say “enough is enough” to your husband and five children is as much as you feel you can handle? Please write back and tell me what you’re afraid of in this regard. Does he dominate the family, including you? Is he afraid of getting the snip? There are other methods of birth control that don’t include a vasectomy or condoms — and you should remind him.

 

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I just came back from a holiday in the sun where I had a crappy time the first week. My wife and I put up with rain every day for an hour or so. Big deal. The traffic was a bit heavy on the highway outside our hotel and noisy. Big deal. My wife complained about everything. Finally I said jokingly: “Fine, go home for the second week where you’ll be happier.” And she did. I made a few good friends the second week and had a much better time without her. Next year I want to go on my own and she can do whatever she wants. I told her this and she said: “But people will think our marriage is in trouble,” and I said: “It is in trouble, lady.” Now she’s sucking up like crazy, but I’m not feeling anything. She wants me to go with her to a counsellor at our church but I refuse.

— Sick of the Big Complainer, Winnipeg

 

Dear Sick: So try to imagine, in detail, what it’d be like to split and live apart. Where would you live? Would you miss your friends? Could you enjoy being single again? Would you miss your wife? If so, what would you miss about her? Is she usually a big complainer, or just on holidays? Maybe you two just need to travel with a friend and not with each other. Could that work?

 

Miss Lonelyhearts

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

Our newsroom depends on a growing audience of readers to power our journalism. If you are not a paid reader, please consider becoming a subscriber.

Our newsroom depends on its audience of readers to power our journalism. Thank you for your support.

Report Error Submit a Tip

More Stories

Pair of banks abandoning Brandon’s downtown

Abiola Odutola 2 minute read Preview

Pair of banks abandoning Brandon’s downtown

Abiola Odutola 2 minute read Yesterday at 2:01 AM CDT

Two of Canada’s major banks are set to relocate from their longstanding downtown Brandon locations in October.

Read
Yesterday at 2:01 AM CDT

Elevate things between you by breaking ice

Maureen Scurfield 5 minute read 2:00 AM CDT

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I work in a high rise downtown and every day I come to work at the same time. I often ride the elevator up with this new guy working a few floors under me. I always feel a little disappointed when he has to get off, and I continue up into the sky.

I’ve worked my way up to speaking pleasantries about the weather, and he responds with cute remarks about the clouds. The good news? He’s not wearing a ring. I also found out his first name from hearing other people say hello to him. Now what?

— Feeling Frustrated! Downtown

Dear Frustrated: Next time you’re on the elevator ride together, say “Hi! My name is such-and-such and I work at such-and-such. Where do you work up here in the clouds?” That should make him smile and break the ice. Then you could consider asking if he might like to join you for a coffee on a work break, if you can co-ordinate it.

Rural Manitoba homeowner charged with shooting at accused thieves

Nicole Buffie 4 minute read Preview

Rural Manitoba homeowner charged with shooting at accused thieves

Nicole Buffie 4 minute read Yesterday at 5:51 PM CDT

A homeowner in southern Manitoba has been charged after he fired shots at a group of people accused of stealing from his property, police say.

Officers were sent to the Rural Municipality of Dufferin Saturday after a report of a theft in progress. RCMP said four people went to the property, located about 95 kilometres southwest of Winnipeg, and returned later the same day driving two vehicles stolen from Watrous, Sask.

The owner of the property, a 66-year-old man, saw the suspects on a motion-activated camera and saw someone transferring fuel from a portable container into one of the stolen vehicles. The man confronted the group and fired shots towards the vehicles, police said.

Three people stayed at the scene until officers arrived and took them into custody, RCMP said. Various items believed to have been stolen from the property were found in the back of a truck. A fourth suspect fled in the other vehicle.

Read
Yesterday at 5:51 PM CDT

Paralyzed foster girl has system under a microscope

Chris Kitching 6 minute read Preview

Paralyzed foster girl has system under a microscope

Chris Kitching 6 minute read Yesterday at 2:00 AM CDT

An internal investigation by Manitoba’s Families Department is nearly complete in the case of a six-year-old girl who is paralyzed after being assaulted by her foster mother in Winnipeg.

The review by child-welfare officials is intended to prevent similar incidents, but it’s unlikely the public will learn the findings or recommendations.

“We’re working closely with the (child and family services) authority to make sure that every recommendation is taken seriously and implemented,” Families Minister Nahanni Fontaine said Monday.

“They’re important (investigations) because they help us identify what went wrong so we can make those changes to ensure something like this tragedy never happens again.”

Read
Yesterday at 2:00 AM CDT

No timeline to reopen city-owned fitness facility in North Kildonan after mould discovery

Joyanne Pursaga 4 minute read Preview

No timeline to reopen city-owned fitness facility in North Kildonan after mould discovery

Joyanne Pursaga 4 minute read Yesterday at 5:29 PM CDT

A city-run fitness centre that suddenly closed for repairs last October lacks a set date to reopen, while an investigation on how best to fix it is underway.

Peguis Trail Health and Fitness Centre in North Kildonan was first expected to welcome visitors back within a few weeks when it shut down due to plumbing problems on Oct. 28.

But in February, the city’s website noted a much later reopening date of Oct. 2 after mould was discovered when crews attempted to upgrade the floors.

The city has since hired a consultant to assess the site’s condition, determine what repairs must be done and estimate how much the work would cost, including mould abatement.

Read
Yesterday at 5:29 PM CDT

Men accused in commercial break-in spree were wearing ankle bracelets

Erik Pindera 5 minute read Preview

Men accused in commercial break-in spree were wearing ankle bracelets

Erik Pindera 5 minute read Monday, Aug. 17, 2026

Two men in electric ankle bracelets who were being monitored by justice officials have been accused in a two-month spree of commercial break-ins, vehicle thefts and other property crimes.

City police have charged one of the suspects and are searching for the second.

About $140,000 worth of property, including trailers, lawn equipment, motorcycles and bicycles, was reported stolen in 13 incidents in Winnipeg and the Rural Municipality of Headingley between April 20 and June 28, the Winnipeg Police Service said.

Both suspects were wearing electronic monitoring bracelets during that time.

Read
Monday, Aug. 17, 2026