Snitching is better than keeping quiet

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This article was published 07/09/2018 (2940 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My brother came home with an iPad and I know for a fact that he can’t afford one. He told my parents that he won it playing Fortnite (a video game with real prizes), but I know that isn’t true because he told me he found it. He is good at Fortnite but he isn’t that good — I’m definitely better than him. I told him I knew he didn’t win it, and he told me: “Brothers don’t snitch on each other.” But I know stealing is wrong, and someone is definitely missing an iPad out there. What do I do?

— I Know Better, the Maples

Dear Know Better: It’s better to tell your parents than to keep your brother’s secret and have him go into a downward spiral of theft and crime that could land him in jail. He will be angry with you and there may be a fight in your future, but sometimes you have to choose to do the right thing, no matter what might happen. Try to tell both your parents at the same time, but if that won’t work, pick the one who is strong enough to make your brother return the iPad. 

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I was looking for something in storage recently and came across a box of mementoes from my first relationship. It was a relationship of nearly a decade and during that time, she made a lot of cute things for me such as scrapbooks and love letters. We broke up nearly five years ago, and that box never crossed my mind.

I don’t have any strong feelings towards her now (positive or negative), but that box definitely threw me for a loop. I’m in a very loving and happy relationship now and I worry that having these keepsakes might bother my new woman. But I also worry I might find myself 60 years old, regretting throwing out those memories.

My past is my past and I’d love to leave it there, but I don’t want to do anything I will regret. I’d be happy leaving that box in the basement another five years but I know that my girlfriend and I are going to likely be buying a house together in the near future and that’s really the ultimate deadline for addressing this. Help! 

— Boxing Up The Past, St. Norbert

 Dear Boxing: I suggest you keep one or two things out of the box and chuck the rest.

Someday you may be writing a book about your life and it would be good to have something that triggers old memories. For now, it’s clear you don’t want to think about it anymore, and for sure your girlfriend doesn’t want to find a whole box full of keepsakes from another love.

Pick out a couple of things that aren’t too intimate — no love letters that could make you cry 25 years later. Keep a scrapbook with photos or a toy she made and throw out the emotional stuff. Good luck with that.

Got a problem in your personal life? Email Miss Lonelyhearts at lovecoach@hotmail.com

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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