Relationship was unravelling before sweater spat

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This article was published 12/02/2021 (2067 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: Valentine’s Day is coming and I’ve been knitting my sweetheart a present. Last night he said he didn’t think we should exchange gifts this year, because of the expense. That’s ridiculous! I’ve already made him most of a sweater, and he’s seen me knitting it. I told him that, and he shrugged his shoulders.

I started crying and I told him to go home. On the way out he said, “But we have to agree on these gift things first!”

Miss L., he has a job and it pays well. I thought we were in love, but he’s cheapskate. My momma warned me to never to marry a cheap guy like my father. The thing is, I don’t want to break up just before Valentine’s Day, but what else can I do?

— His Sweater’s Almost Done, Weston

Dear Almost Done: Your mom was right, and now you have the proof of it. There’s nothing wrong with breaking up around Valentine’s Day when the love is not mutual. The sweater brought things to a head, and maybe that’s a good thing. If looking at the sweater upsets you, unravel it with gusto!

There’s nothing worse than marrying the same kind of faulty man who hurt and embarrassed your mother. Learn from momma. She told you that out of her own pain, so listen to her! Don’t sign up for a lifetime of what she went through, when you already know better.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I have neighbours who fight constantly, and not just arguments. They scream and hit things. I can’t see into their apartment, so I’m not sure if they hit each other, but it gets crazy.

I’ve called the cops before, and while they do come, these two are still together and still fighting all the time. I worry about the woman living there, but what else can I do? They choose to stay together.

It’s starting to become more frequent and is driving me crazy. Is there anything I can do beyond moving out? I like my block and location.

— Helpless and Pushed to the Limit, Downtown

Dear Pushed to the Limit: Talk to the super of the block, and also block management, and ask for a change of apartment for you. Tell them the yelling and screaming next door is getting worse, and that police have been by, yet they don’t manage to stop them for long. It’s understandable you don’t want to talk to the fighting couple yourself. Maybe capture some of the fight sounds on your cellphone to play for evidence.

Your apartment superintendent or management company may own several blocks and may be able to offer you a move to one of their other properties, or simply a move to a different floor of your block. Spring is coming and that’s a popular moving time. That means more opportunities for you in your block, and others nearby.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m working really hard during the pandemic, and going into my workplace. My boyfriend isn’t working — not his fault. But, he’s home on EI and is starting to drive me crazy. He doesn’t do anything productive around the house — not even cooking — and he never goes out, so I don’t even have privacy to have a bath. A bubble bath with my favourite blues music playing is my best form of relaxation; I have a high-stress job.

The sad truth is this: Without his EI money, we’d be kicked out of my tiny rental house. I love this place, but I feel trapped now. What should I do?

— Stressed To the Max, Fort Rouge

Dear Stressed: A lot of couples who were not really ready for 24-7 living together are just waiting for COVID-19 to let up so they can break up, get some privacy and freedom, and maybe go on the hunt again. Is this your situation?

In the meantime, to keep your relationship fresh and perhaps to spark some sexual desire, tell your guy you need some alone time in the house. He’s probably lonely when you’re off at work. But still, he could go out for a walk or run every night — after a warm dinner and a friendly chat with you.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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