Trust fido’s instincts and make clean break

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This article was published 25/11/2021 (1727 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I’m a prize fool. Three times my recent ex came back to see me for sex. I let her stay, even though my faithful dog showed aggression towards her. I had to put him in another bedroom and he bashed the door intermittently while she was there.

It turns out she was only coming back into the house with the evil intent of stealing things of mine. She came back three times (I was weak) before I noticed all the missing objects. She stole things she’d enjoyed using when she lived with me. She even took my fancy corkscrew — a gift from my late father.

She worked fast. After she’d taken me to bed and I was exhausted, she’d tell me she’d let herself out. I know now her pockets and purse were loaded. The last time my dog created a ruckus, I let him out quickly, and he ran to the door barking and wanting to chase her. How did he know?

Her petty theft was not worth calling the police, but it made me feel angry and embarrassed to be taken like that. Why am I such a fool?

— Used and Abused, South River Heights

Dear Used and Abused: You’re just a human. Next time you’ll trust your animal friend. Animal specialists say dogs often sense malevolent intention towards their beloved humans. They’re much better at sniffing out the smiling users and thieves than we are — especially if we’re under the bad person’s spell.

You were blind and deaf because of sexual desire for this recent ex. Your dog had no such complication. His eyes, ears and brain were open to sensing the nasty situation as soon as she got in your door with those bad intentions emanating from her.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’d suggest “Not a Whiner” tells her whining recent ex that she “doesn’t want to hear it.” Many times sympathy is rewarding.

(I advised this woman, whose dry, alcoholic boyfriend liked to complain about his horrible past, to let him go and be glad. —Miss L.)

Another solution? My lady tries to one-up me when I complain. I don’t want to hear her complaining, so now I don’t start discussions involving complaints.

I was expecting you to recommend a therapist. That’d get the attention of a man who likely doesn’t want an outsider to be witness to his weakness. Amongst guys, he’d be told to stop complaining or be ghosted. This dude has to make the obvious choice to change.

—R. M., Winnipeg

Dear R. M.: For many complainers “you poor thing!” is their favourite reaction. Accompanied by sex and affection, it’s even better. This guy made it all the way into sympathetic “Not a Complainer’s” bed, and then told her he was dropping her because of her drinking problem. She’d only have a drink or two when they went out for dinner. The truth was, it probably drove him crazy to see her imbibing when he couldn’t do it anymore.

Yes, this complaining dude needs to get more therapy, as he’s still deeply addicted — to sympathy.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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