Lifelong bachelor doesn’t want to end reign

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 21/11/2017 (2879 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Down the road from my house just outside of town lives a man who has been a bachelor all his life. He is handsome and fun, and he has had a number of nice girlfriends over the years.

When my husband was alive, we would sometimes visit with him and his lady friend, or have them over for dinner when she would come for a visit on weekends.

My husband has been gone a few years now, and this guy and I have become close — much closer than people in town realize.

Now I would like to at least live with him, with or without a ring, but he has never wanted a woman to live with him and, as he points out, he lives close by and it’s perfect for us.

Maybe it’s perfect for him, but not for me. How do I change his mind?

— Used To Cosy Cohabiting, Manitoba

Dear Used To Cosy Cohabiting: Believe this bachelor.

He’s not just talking the way a young freedom-loving man does — this is the lifestyle he’s had for many years and he enjoys it.

You enjoyed being married for many years and living very closely together. That is your preferred lifestyle.

You can either accept this man the way he is and live between two houses located close together, or you can make a fuss.

You could break up with him to see if he suffers, breaks down and marries you.

Chances are he won’t and he will be angry because you tried to change him, hurt him, deprive him and otherwise twist his arm so he would bend to your will.

Maybe you need a different guy if you want and need a cosy marriage; however, if you want this guy, there’s probably not going to be a formal marriage in your future.

Would he be willing to commit heart and soul to you, and live in two houses? Would that be enough for you?

 

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m scared stiff of flying in little planes and have to take a pill to get on big ones for holidays.

At first I thought this was no big deal with my new girlfriend, but recently she started calling me names that amount to chicken.

Last week, when she asked me if I had reconsidered taking a flight with her, I told her I wouldn’t and she quietly, but distinctly, made a derisive “puk-puk” noise.

I threw on my clothes, grabbed my keys and coat and left without saying a word.

She has been trying to apologize all week and even sent me flowers, for God’s sake.

That made me feel even more like the girl in the relationship. What should I do?

— Feeling Disrespected, West Kildonan

Dear Feeling Disrespected: That little “puk-puk” noise tells a big story.

The oblique chicken references that preceded it were bad enough, but the “puk-puk” was plain and simple calling you a coward.

Coercion-by-insult doesn’t belong in a loving relationship.

Then there’s the flowers. Although women sometimes send flowers or balloons to their men in happy times, and it’s OK then, this gesture made you feel further emasculated — perhaps like flowers for the crybaby?

She’s not the woman for you, and you don’t need to explain that to her.

You walked out and pulled the plug and she knows why.

Let this girl fly off and find herself another guy who isn’t afraid of flying and be happy she’s gone.

Next time, find yourself a woman who isn’t crazy about flying either (there are lots of people like that around), but will do what’s necessary to go on a big vacation with you.

She would be a better match — in the travel area anyway.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.