Don’t be a prude about girlfriend’s love of being nude

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 29/01/2018 (3157 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My girlfriend is an exhibitionist. I’m surprised she hasn’t been reported by the neighbours. Her favourite thing is to sit on the sill of the picture window in her apartment in the buff. Her bare back is to the window and her bottom is completely exposed. She told me to stop complaining and grow up because she is high enough that no one could see her and there have never been any complaints.

But a guy sent her a note once about watching her through binoculars, and she just felt it was fun and harmless. It was a couple of years ago and nothing ever happened.

What does she really want — sexual action from a stranger? I mean, it kind of excites me to think of what she does and that she sometimes drives to my place in nothing but her fur coat and leather boots to surprise me, but I don’t want there to be any chance she’ll be hurt by someone on the way. What should I do with her to smarten her up, call the cops and give her a scare? — Worried About Her, Osborne Village

Dear Worried About Her: Take a deep breath and calm down before she gets tired of your disapproval and lectures. Lots of guys would love to have a daring girlfriend like this. If she is in any real harm, then of course try to protect her, but calling the cops on her to teach her a lesson? Say what? That is not protection, and the lesson learned will be you are out the door for that interference on the toe of her high-heeled boot!

Calling the police if someone is threatening her or calling her or writing her is more like protecting her, although it will expose her desire for exposure and also her antics.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I have a sex problem I can’t deal with myself, so I took it to a male sex surrogate I know of, and he helped me. I can function with him, but I still can’t function with my all-thumbs husband. My surrogate taught me how to relax and let the erotic feelings flow, as he teased and built me higher and higher to climax, but when I tried to explain these techniques to my husband, telling him I read them in a book, he just wanted to see the book. I told him I returned it to the library. He asked for the book’s name and I said I forgot.

He doesn’t believe me and I don’t blame him. I love my husband as a dear friend, but he is a lousy lover. For five long years he has laid the blame on me, but my sex surrogate taught me the blame was more than 50 per cent my husband’s in not learning how to prepare me for explosive orgasms and 50 per cent on me for not reading and experimenting at all before getting married.

To my amazement, I found out I can have great passionate sex, but it looks like it’s not going to happen with my suspicious husband. So where does that leave me? My husband says he thinks I’m cheating on him, and he’s hurt and angry, but I just got so fed up being told it was always my fault that I had to go and find out some way. My girlfriends knew of this guy who teaches women, but the girls didn’t teach me how to fool my husband. Their husbands are not as bright as mine. Now what do I do? — In Deep Trouble, Winnipeg

Dear Deep Trouble: The bottom line is your lessons with the surrogate didn’t translate to helping you have passionate sex with your husband because no one is teaching him at the same time. How would you feel about your husband getting a female sex surrogate to train him how to make love to you?

Your husband certainly doesn’t want instruction from you, especially now that he suspects you of cheating and getting your instruction from another guy. Why would he want sexual advice originating from that source?

If you tell the truth about the sex surrogate, you might feel better for confessing, but your husband is going to press for the surrogate’s name and then the real trouble starts. The good thing that came out of this is you found out you’re not totally to blame for the sex not working in your marriage. You are actually a passionate woman and can build to complete satisfaction with a good lover. There is some relief in that, when all this simmers down. The only thing that might save this marriage is counselling, but at this point it would be very hard on your husband’s pride to attend.

Do you want to stay with this man where there is not going to be sexual satisfaction now or later? If you find out 100 per cent this marriage is not going to work out sexually, do you want to have children and be tied to this man? These are important points to ponder.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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