Fess up to mom about getting fired

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This article was published 07/03/2018 (3135 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’ve been crying in my pillow because I don’t want anyone in the house to notice. I got fired from my part-time job for smoking pot in the bathroom at work. I guess I kind of wanted to get fired because I hated the job (at a fast-food place), but my mom got it for me through her friend who’s the boss there and she thought she was doing me a favour. I’m her only child and she thinks I’m an angel. When her friend fired me, she said she was going to have to talk to my mom about it and I begged her not to. I guess if she hasn’t done it by now, she may not, but who knows?

For the first few evening shifts, I pretended to go to work, but went and hung out at a friend’s house instead. It’s really bothering me, having this hanging over my head day and night. I’m constantly worrying about what I should do. Another friend saw how desperate I am feeling and has gotten me on with her at her mom’s flower business in late March, but that’s weeks from now and then it will be two weeks before I get paid. I am so broke! If I confess, my mom is going to ground me for sure. Please help. — Feeling Horrible, Like a Criminal, Winnipeg

Dear Feeling Horrible, Like a Criminal: Tell your mom what happened and take your punishment, then you won’t be waiting nervously for your mother’s friend to call her with the news. You may be grounded and bored to death, but your mother loves you. At least she will know you’re broke and will take care of you financially, though you won’t likely be getting a fat allowance.

Meanwhile, do whatever it takes to solidify that job offer at the flower shop, so it’s not just a vague second-hand offer through your friend. Make sure you dress up and go see the owner to talk about what you’ll be doing and when you’ll start. At least you’ll have a new job to tell your mom about, which might soften the blow.

And next time, don’t smoke pot at work.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m 14 and my girlfriend is 16. We can’t go anywhere together as boyfriend-girlfriend because I’m younger than she is and everybody would tease us at our school, so we kind of pretend to be enemies. We tease each other a lot at school and then can’t wait until we can be together and be what we really are.

We got together over our love of an activity outside of school and we have had a secret romance since the beginning of the school year. She’s not embarrassed to have a younger boyfriend, but I am embarrassed to have an older girlfriend. People might be thinking a lot of things are true that aren’t true, like maybe I’m having a sexual relationship with her (I’m not). We kiss good night and hold each other, but we don’t do anything with our clothes off.

I don’t see any solution possible, so that‘s why I’m writing you. Pretty soon, I’ll be 15, but then in a few months she turns 17. She’s in Grade 11 and I’m in Grade 9 right now. Next year, I’ll be in a new school where she isn’t and we’re hoping to come out then. I’m growing taller quite quickly and my voice has changed, mostly. — Age Shouldn’t Matter, Manitoba

Dear Age Shouldn’t Matter: You can at least let the fake enemy thing go now and be public as friends who got past bugging each other. A lot of young people know that’s a ruse for making contact with someone, as they’ve done it themselves. It’s likely some of your friends at school have figured you two out as people with crushes on each other.

There’s only a few month in the same school left. Why not experiment in late spring while you’re still at the same school together and see how people react? Your secret girlfriend is already OK with it and she’s the one more likely to be teased. Some guys your age may actually think you’re a hero for getting an older girl interested in you.

If people are bugging you, remember you’re in a different school in the fall.

Then it’s a lot easier to date anyone you want without having it pointed out.

Good luck!

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6

Miss Lonelyhearts
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