Time to take the ‘freak’ out of being clean

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 14/07/2019 (2615 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I read your advice to a “clean freak” who gags, and you told the person to see a psychologist! I am a “clean freak” and everyone I know thinks this is a quality they envy.

I too have a weak stomach and gag even if someone I am eating with has food on their face, talks with food in their mouth or tastes the food they are cooking and puts the spoon back in the pot. I will eat at their house, but I point these things out to them and they don’t do it. In fact, they say they’re sorry because they know it’s wrong (uncouth).

I don’t like eating at other people’s houses, and that’s why I always suggest we go out. And even then, if they talk with food in their mouth, I involuntarily gag. There is something called “manners” and obviously you don’t have any, otherwise you wouldn’t be telling this person to see a psychologist.

I don’t know anyone who doesn’t use sanitizer before eating or touching food, or after touching money, door knobs or anything really, especially when in a restaurant.

I do realize we need our bodies to be exposed to germs, at times, but your advice to this person is totally unprofessional. I hope this person reads my letter to you and will feel good about themselves. — Clean Freak, Manitoba

Dear Clean: Clearly you’re from the camp where “cleanliness is next to godliness” and you feel you’re right in supporting extreme reactions, including gagging. You also urge going to restaurants rather than accepting invitations to your (possibly) unsanitary friends houses for dinner. And you think there’s nothing extreme in that? These are not “manners” issues and a psychologist can be of great help with this.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m a 51-year-old man working for a financial company and there is a woman working here who’s in her early 30s. I believe she has somewhat of a crush on me. She’s in a whole other department.

I find her dynamic and exciting and beautiful, so I really want to ask her out, but it’s at work and I’m almost 20 years older than her. What’s my next move? — Itching To Ask Her Out, Winnipeg

Dear Itching: Let’s face it, your hormones are steering the ship at this point and you probably don’t much care about the dangers in the waters ahead.

The 20-year difference, plus the fact you work in the same company, are two strikes against the advisability of your getting together with this woman in a romantic way. Also, you don’t mention if either one of you are “with” other people, as in married, getting divorced, separated.

Look, you can’t have everyone your body wants! None of us can. There are crushes within workplaces that often have to go unsatisfied. This should be one of them. But, you and I both know you’re asking for a cute way to ask her out and show her a great time. You’d like me to name the next move.

Admittedly, I do have a strategic mind where romance is concerned, and could tell you how to hook her, and how to hide it for awhile. But I’d rather you both kept your jobs, in these difficult financial times. It’s not likely you’d get fired for hooking up with someone at work in 2019, but it’s still an unpopular move with management, and often with other workers.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My son is starting Grade 1 but still sucks his thumb constantly. I thought it was cute, but from what I’ve heard from other parents that can be a one-way ticket to bullying. I want the best for him, but I don’t want to hurt his feelings and call him a baby. What should I say to him? — His Loving Dad, Fort Richmond.

Dear Loving Dad: Nine ways to wean a child from this habit can be found online at Web MD. In short, they suggest you try to limit thumb-sucking to a house or bedtime activity, not forbid thumb-sucking so as not to make it a confrontation and then to praise the child when they don’t use the activity.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave. Winnipeg R2X 3B6

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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