Respect friends for choosing to tell tough truths

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 08/07/2020 (2270 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I had my heart broken recently when I learned the guy I thought I was falling for (he said I couldn’t meet him in person because of COVID-19) was actually living with a woman.

My best friend was scared I’d be really mad at her for telling me because she “wrecked my romance.” My first reaction was, “You’re just jealous! How do you know this is true? How could you go snooping around like this and try to wreck my new love life?” I yelled, “My new guy says he can hardly wait to meet me!”

She took a few days and wrote back; “I knew of someone with this unusual nickname, and I was able to check it out. If you want pictures of them kissing at the car at 8:30 a.m., drive by this back lane” — and she gave me the address. I was so mad I could spit! I simmered down an hour later and realized she’d probably already done it, and already had a photo herself.

When I called back, I asked her; she sent it to me instantly. I wanted to throw up. There they were kissing passionately. I phoned him and left a blistering message he will never forget.

I learned a big lesson from this. I want your readers to know if a friend “outs” somebody who’s playing you for a fool, they are extremely valuable. They take the chance of being disbelieved and rejected — but they care enough to tell you anyway.

— Learned My Lesson, West End

Dear Learned My Lesson: COVID-19 has made single people very lonely and susceptible to being played.

As months go by, some singles are willing to take more chances and an amorous phone “lover” looking for a laugh can make a lot of headway.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: Well, I had a strange experience and I don’t know who to tell. I need help, but it’s embarrassing.

I tried out sex with a bisexual friend of mine who told me I wasn’t a true bisexual, since I didn’t really enjoy my first experience.

The truth is, I think he’s a bad lover and he was never meant to initiate anybody as a teacher. I don’t know how to tell him. He told me I must be mistaken as to my own sexual identity. Ha! There is a man I really want to be with, and am still very attracted to, but he is a friend of this guy.

Since this first man wrote me off as “hopeless,” how do I approach his friend?

— Not Hopeless, Just Had a Bad Teacher, Winnipeg

Dear Not Hopeless: You wait now, for two good reasons. First, the experiment with this first friend will be pretty much forgotten and I’m guessing you will drift apart. Second, now is not the time to be experimenting intimately with anyone who is not already in your bubble. If you wait long enough, the COVID-19 situation will eventually be under control. You’ve waited this long to experiment with your sexuality, so why not wait until it’s safe?

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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