Little white lie could deter hot-blooded sister

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 15/05/2021 (1972 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I met my handsome man and married him so fast his brothers didn’t have time to get home for the wedding.

Since then, my younger sister has had time to get on Zoom and introduce herself to everybody in my husband’s family for chats.

Now she’s developed a major crush on my young brother-in-law, who is single. I just found out she’s been chasing the pants off him online. He told my husband last night he “knows her type and isn’t interested.” He wanted to know how to get rid of her, without causing trouble in the family.

The thing is, no man gets rid of my sister until she’s done with him! She has a vicious tongue and lashes out.

I told my husband this, and he said, “My little brother is the teddy bear of my family. She better not hurt him, or she’ll be sorry.” Now I don’t know what to do, but I’d better do something fast.

— Stuck in the Middle, western Manitoba 

Dear Stuck: Talk to your protective husband about a trick to pull on your sister. Your brother-in-law needs to know he has your blessing. Then he needs to tell your little sister (with the big ego) he finds her very attractive, but he’s “already crazy about another woman he met previously” — that nobody in the family knows about.

Yes, it’s a fib, but it’ll probably keep him safe long enough for her to find another attractive target.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: This pandemic has left me feeling in danger. Just the thought of going out in the world makes my mind race. My heart starts to beat through my chest, and I feel like I can’t take a full breath.

For the past year, I’ve been working from my home office. In the beginning, I didn’t really like it, but it was a change, and convenient. Now, I don’t think I’ll be able to return to my current position.

At first, I thought it was stress-related, but these feelings are completely foreign. I always took pride in being a strong, independent man. Now, I feel like a scared boy.

For many months, I haven’t left my home much at all. I have ordered my groceries and everything else off Amazon and had medications delivered right to my door.

Just the thought of leaving the safety of my home causes such an overwhelming feeling of dread, I confess I have to use alcohol — or I get on the phone and talk nervously like I’m losing control of myself. What is happening to me?

— Losing It, North River Heights

Dear Losing It: Lots of people are feeling fearful and stressed in this pandemic. In your case, it sounds like you’re verging on a panic attack.

It’s time to talk to your doctor, reveal those symptoms and also confess you’ve been drinking alcohol to self-medicate. Your physician might actually suggest natural ways to relax, such as deep-breathing exercises, yoga and calming teas like chamomile, or prescribe anti-anxiety medication.

There are also good counsellors and psychologists working by phone and online right now.

Some other stress relievers? Once you’re vaccinated, it could ease your panic a good deal, and why not double-mask everywhere you go?

Animals can be soothing as well. Loving, petting and exercising them brings down the tension. Just getting out of your house — the place you believe is your protection — will prove it’s safer than you think outside. Start driving to see sunsets, or go biking and snap some photos.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My wife is always bugging me to buy her some “important” jewelry. She’s got a diamond ring. How much more important can you get? When I tell her I don’t know what she means, she scoffs and says: “Other husbands know what their wives would like.”

— Clued Out, North Kildonan

Dear Clued Out: OK, there’s your clue — one or two of your wife’s girlfriends has a piece of bling she covets. Ask her casually to tell you about her girlfriend’s jewelry. You will be able to tell from her voice if she loves real gemstones or artisan-designed pieces — or possibly a bracelet big enough to have a loving inscription on the back.

Please send questions to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

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