Pandemic philosophy is your prerogative

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 17/04/2022 (1571 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I’m so mixed up because COVID is on the rise again just when I’m getting so many more invitations. I can accept getting COVID from a family member or close friend, but the thought of getting it from a stranger really upsets me.

On the other hand, I can’t stand being in the house so much. I don’t have a playbook for the COVID end game, and the frustration is making me cranky and short with people. Yesterday somebody called me a “spoilsport.” Can you help me?

— Not a Spoilsport! Garden City

Dear Not a Spoilsport: You can still have a fun “family and close friends” summer. Big sporting events and concerts where you’d be sharing the air with thousands of strangers still don’t make sense for the way you feel. But, an outdoor restaurant with friends or family would be a safer option. So would an afternoon at a less populated beach, or a week at a cabin with a little beach nearby.

As for the question of masking, no matter what other people are doing, you can still wear your mask when you want to, no apologies or explanations needed.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My wife had a close boyfriend before she met me. They had plans to get married, but they’d reached the four-year mark and there was still no ring. Then I came along, stole her away and married her. Her useless boyfriend was furious, but he moved back to the country both he and my wife are from, which was a relief.

A month ago, I heard he was back living in Winnipeg again. I didn’t care. But then, he dropped in on my wife when I was away on a sales trip. I only found out because our neighbour informed me. When I confronted my wife, she defended her ex, saying it was no big deal. He just wanted to say hello from people “at home” they both knew. So why didn’t he just phone?

Something isn’t adding up here. I can feel it’s me she loves, but I need to get him to stay away for good. I need some advice.

— Suspicious Husband, West End

Dear Suspicious: Your wife loved her ex-boyfriend for a long time, but he wouldn’t commit to her, and it was no doubt embarrassing. There’s a chance she let him come over while you were away only to hear him grovel, but she may still have feelings for him. You need to have a heart-to-heart now, and find out how she really feels, even if it hurts to hear it.

If she’s truly yours and doesn’t want this guy, he needs to hear from you directly — no threats, just a clear telephone message never to come calling on your wife again! You also need to make it clear to your wife that ex-partners on either side are not welcome at your house.

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: My boyfriend wants me to start attending his big fancy modern church with him. I’ve been three times — that’s enough! I’m Catholic, and have my own faith since I was born — and I love my beautiful old church. Generations of our family have gone there, and still go together.

Now he’s saying this could be a “make it or break it” thing for us. He’s really good-looking — just my type — and very intelligent, but quite pushy about his religion. Apparently, it’s the only way to stay his girlfriend. What would you say to him?

— Curious, St. Norbert

Dear Curious: “Goodbye,” would be my reply. This guy has actually threatened you with breakup if you don’t do what he says. Threatening behaviour is not a good sign in any relationship. Besides that, your own religion is a positive, personal and historical thing for you and you enjoy sharing the traditions with your family.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

   Read full biography

Miss Lonelyhearts
Advice Columnist

   Read full biography