Don’t miss out on opportunity a second time

DEAR MISS LONELYHEARTS: I met up with a familiar face at a neighbourhood bar, when I was waiting for an old friend. It was the son of the man my mom dated for a short time right after she left my father.

This gorgeous son once came with his dad over to our house! Mom’s new man had just picked up this son from hockey, and he stopped by to see my mom.

The son came into the porch with him, and he was so gorgeous I couldn’t even find my voice to talk, other than saying hello.

His dad said they had to run, and they left too quickly. I never saw either of them again. It was probably for the best, because that son was a major attraction for me, and I dreamed about him afterwards for two weeks.

He smiled at me down the bar, and said, “Hey! I remember you from that time with my dad at your house. What’s your name?”

Then he moved right onto the stool next to me and said, “I would have called you, but I didn’t know your number, and didn’t want to ask my dad.” I laughed and said, “I wouldn’t have been into double-dating with our parents, anyway!” He shuddered in agreement. Cute reaction!

We only ended up chatting for a minute or two, but here’s the problem: I’m dreaming about him again! I’m older now, and bold enough to contact him, but I didn’t get his info. I’m not going to ask my mother to call his dad for it, either. Anyway, she dumped his father long ago!

So how do I get to connect with this guy? Maybe Facebook, or is that teeny-bopperish?

— Want to Get in Touch, St. Vital

Dear Get in Touch: Don’t let this fall through the cracks a second time! Definitely try tracking this attractive guy on social media, remind him who you are and then ask him if he wants to meet for coffee or a drink!

If he tells you he already has a girlfriend, don’t fade out completely. Give him your phone number to contact you when he’s “free from that entanglement.” That phrase will make him smile! He’ll know you’re attracted — but you’re not into cheating behind anybody’s back. Good luck on another in-person meeting one day soon, and this time not by chance!

PS: Your mom really doesn’t need to know about this happening, at least not yet. She might contact the guy’s dad and cause his son some embarrassment, and mess things up for you two!

Dear Miss Lonelyhearts: I’m sick of running into my ex-wife, who now has a wife of her own. I don’t want to be anything to her and certainly not her friend.

But we went too far at being separate. We didn’t check in with each other, and this year we both ended up curling out of the same rink!

I hardly recognized her after more than five years apart. She has a “renewed” face and a fit body, but she still looks tired and cranky to me! I see that constantly disapproving expression on her face. She looks at me, as if nothing I could ever do in this lifetime would be right.

Do I sound bitter? No wonder. I don’t really want to leave my curling club, so what can I do?

— Confused Ex, Westwood

Dear Confused: It’s really time to move on! Even if you need to drive halfway across town, seek out another great curling rink that’s clearly an improvement on your current one, and nowhere your ex-wife is even going to think about curling. Most people won’t put two and two together and come up with “bitter exes necessitated a move.”

Knowing your ex-wife’s personality and her history with you, try to avoid all those confusing and still-hurtful feelings. Just leave her and her complicated life behind. You two need to be finished for good.

Please send your questions and comments to lovecoach@hotmail.com or Miss Lonelyhearts c/o the Winnipeg Free Press, 1355 Mountain Ave., Winnipeg, MB, R2X 3B6.

Maureen Scurfield
Advice columnist

Maureen Scurfield writes the Miss Lonelyhearts advice column.

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